Today, while walking home with my mom, some unoriginal cockshart in a passing car yelled at me: "Fuck her in the pussy!" It was a long, awkward walk home after that. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while walking home with my boyfriend, he jokingly slapped my butt. A man as old as my dad drove by, yelled "Wooo, spank that ass! DAMN!" and kept leering at me before finally driving off. FML
Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML
Today, I was out shopping with my mom. While we were walking, a guy in a car honked at me. I'm not used to compliments, so I was pretty flattered and flashed him a smile. He looked back at me, confused, then shook his head and pointed at my mom. FML
Today, I missed my bus, so I walked home in the rain from school, only to realize my mom had been following me the whole time in the car, laughing her ass off. FML
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified, me or him. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a car started cruising alongside me. I looked over, annoyed, at which point the driver started screaming obscenities and telling me that I'm "gonna get it" for "betraying" him, before angrily speeding off. I'm too scared to even sleep now. FML
Today, I was on a crowded subway going home. My trousers were a bit dusty so I tried to dust myself off. As I was slapping the side of my leg I missed and hit a woman behind me in the ass. She called me a pervert and walked off. Everyone stared at me. It takes 40 minutes to get home. FML
Today, I was coming out of my work and a group of guys yelled, "Oh shoot girl!" and I blew them a kiss jokingly, then as I walked down the street, cars were honking at me, guys whistling. When I got home I noticed the foot long rip down my pencil skirt. FML
Today, while I was waiting at the bus stop, a car that looked like my mom's pulled up. Thinking it was actually her, I walked up and jokingly asked what she was into. The guy inside now thinks that I'm a prostitute. FML
Today, I missed my bus. I had to ride my bike 2 miles. Once I left, some jerk nearly hit me. I flipped him off and shouted obsceneties. It was my dad, offering me a ride. He left. FML
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Top comments
DanShowsNoMercy 13
Leave that to your dad.
Googolman 29
That's just the way life is.
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Comments (103)
Googolman 29
That's just the way life is.
fuckyourlifeOP 25
If that's how life is, then I say **** life right in the pussy.
YoursAlways98 13
No, that's just the way sexist, disrespectful assholes are.
ihavenolifehaha 16
#29 - You take jokes way too serious.
dcam13 19
you talk about civil topics like "cockshart" with your mom I'm guessing. bahaha unoriginal.
nevm 12
#29 so if the guy said "**** him right in the asshole" would it have been ok?
TheOnlyMizLiv 22
#34- Yeah, but cat-calling is still pretty ******* annoying.
incoherentrmblr 22
F**K her RIGHT in the pussy! Fred strikes again...
DanShowsNoMercy 13
Leave that to your dad.
IamHercules 24
I second this motion
False_Stupidity 42
All in favour, raise you hand! *raises hand*
mkayden 23
*raises the roof*
RA91 26
#26 ^(•_•)^
LittleRed79 39
*raises a little hell*
treyford 12
*raises taxes and national fund dept*
Diarrhea_Volcano 29
*Raises Both hands and feet*
RoboCunnilingus 23
*razes village*
15Erik 21
*Raises hands, drops skittles*
skittle_QUEEN_YO 15
*raises flag* FOR MOTHER RUSSIA!
merhbu 4
this isnt really that bad at all. they were just trying to be funny lol
cornyrob 33
I thought it was funny. Nothing i world do, though.
onlychildFTW 34
I think it's stupid and not at all funny. Talk about unoriginal and over used.
foxwasalamb 24
catcalling is harassment you know
Ki11erC 18
Meow.
Llama24 14
Hey, stop harassing me!!!
Aew 17
Ugh, your poor mom. There's no way to lighten the mood after that, either.
MrConcise 35
"I'm outta your league, son. You didn't get my good looks."
Aew 17
That's the perfect line! I would have walked all the way home in silence before I found a way to diffuse the discomfort.
candisweets 10
it could have gone worse...you could have been walking with your dad. FYL
_parth 20
Well then. **** this generation.
Schrypt 15
right in the pussy?
cadillacgal79 32
Ah yes, blame a whole generation based on one unoriginal asswipe.
R2Y2 22
What if the person in the car was just as old as you?
aljop 15
Was this in Arkansas?
connorgrant98 24
It was in texas
fuckyourlifeOP 25
Plaaants from Texas are dumb? Shooes from Texas are dumb? People who have nothing better to do than to scream out shit like that are dumb? Yes, Patrick, yes they are.
smokecloud_ 37
Cincinnati. .. Who dey!
martin8337 36
West Virginia.
royal_ranger 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That would be incest. Ew.
romesshh 12
Thanks captain obvious
royal_ranger 12
You're welcome lieutenant sarcasm.
Ltsdragons 19
Anything for you comrade comeback
razoray9 22
#55. I believe Sgt. Sarcasm would be the more appropriate term
connorgrant98 24
People like him are just immature and have nothing better to do than things like this.
hobojo69 23
That sucks op, people should be more original, that was so last year