Today, my wife tried to catch the bouquet at my sister's wedding. Afterward I informed her that only single women were supposed to do that, and she replied "I know". My wife told me that she was divorcing me at my sister's wedding. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Chopped
Today, my girlfriend caught the bouquet at her sister's wedding. I took it as a sign so after we got home, I proposed. She laughed and said no way. I'm done. FML
Today, at my sister's wedding, she and I had a plan that she would purposely throw the bouquet to my girlfriend, then I would propose in front of everyone. When the bouquet landed in my girlfriend's lap, she screamed, "Ew, no way" and threw it to someone else. FML
Crazy chick
Today, at my sister's wedding, I went to the very back of the crowd of women waiting to catch the bouquet. Not only did I end up catching it, I was accosted by a crazy chick who ripped it out of my hands, screaming at me in Italian. I later found out she was already engaged. FML
What have I done now?
Today, my girlfriend caught the bouquet at her friend's wedding, then shook them in my face like an accusation. I joined in the laughing with everyone else, but it put her in a mood, and she now hasn’t spoken to me in two days. FML
Today, I went to my friend's beautiful wedding. The only other single girl there was 5 years old. She caught the bouquet. FML
Today, we went to the wedding of one of my friends. As she was about to throw her bouquet, my boyfriend muttered that if I tried to catch it, we'd be through. FML
Today, at my aunt's wedding, the time for the tossing of the bouquet came and the announcer asked for all the single ladies to gather behind the bride. I was the only one. FML
Today, I got married. After the ceremony, my sister asked to talk to me. I followed her and she told me that we are no longer related because we don't have the same last name anymore. FML
Scheming
Today, I was supposed to get married. Instead, my sister made up a story about me cheating on my fiancé at the bachelorette party. He bought it and dumped me, despite there being no evidence of this. Turns out it was all a plan because they were secretly seeing each other for months. FML
First!
Today, I announced my engagement. My mother's response was to freak out and demand that I postpone my wedding indefinitely. Why? My younger sister caught the bouquet at a wedding last year, so "she has to get married first!" My sister has been single for 3 years and showers once a week. FML
Top comments
Starsmydog 0
Your wife is a bitch. You deserve better!
mehwhateverr 0
Bad news: You're getting a divorce. Good news: You're rid of a heartless bitch. FYL.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (78)
z_vet 0
Oh, man… +1 #14.
intrepid00 0
This doesn't mean she wants to end the marriage unless she followed up saying that. She could have simplely wanted to catch it.
typohater 0
Afterward is not a word and there should be a comma after afterwards
cxal_fml 0
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/afterward You might want to invest in a dictionary before you make another comment like this one. If you type in afterwards, the default spelling MW takes you to is afterward :D.
GlamRockPrincess 0
Seriously? GET A LIFE!!! Most people who go on this site do it for a mental break from being a perfect version of themselves at work or school. Its a haven to not have to worry about being ridiculed and just be themselves. Get off YOU'RE high hourse! You are a LOSER for having nothing better to do then try to take that away from people!
Jay9313 0
You know, most of the things we learn in school are supposed to be used without thinking, so he doesn't need to get a life, YOU need to go to school ;]
blue8795 0
You know, I never call fake on these posts, but I hope to God this one is. That's just terrible; I hope it was a joke.
anniebananie 3
Maybe she wasn't serious and she meant it like, "I KNOW only single women are supposed to do it, but I haven't been part of a bouquet toss before, and I really wanted to participate."
Casualt1234 0
i think what the OP is trying to say is that at the wedding, the wife actually told him she wants a divorce. of course, he should've been a little clearer in saying that in the FML
swooshq 0
Well....when one marriage ends another one starts..or something. Heh, sorry man that sucks so much.
rygy481 0
Ouch! 50% of all marrages end in divorce. 1% of all marrages end at the wedding. Sorry
pjunior89 0
1st place for burn.. what a bitch
wikifoo 0
cold beatch
Shyman4ever 0
Maybe she said that because she just wanted the flowers lololololololololololololol