Today, my mom decided to take away my TV after noticing that I watch the show True Blood. Apparently, since I watch this, I must be "curious about sex." I'm 19. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was watching a movie that had a mild sex scene in it. My mother walked in just as that scene was starting and she flipped out. I'm now grounded. She's taken my TV and laptop out of my room and refuses to let me see my boyfriend because she's sure he's the cause of my "disgusting behaviour". FML
Today, my mom watched a Dr. Phil episode. She's now hysterical because she assumes me and my friends are involved in sex parties. All because a man on the TV said so. FML
Today, my mom overheard me telling my 6 year-old about periods. My mom condescendingly asked, “Isn’t she a bit young for that?” That’s pretty rich coming from a woman who didn’t want to share the TV, so all of us grew up watching whatever violent or raunchy sex filled R-rated crap she wanted to watch. FML
Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML
Today, I heard my parents having sex for the first time so I turned the TV up really loud to drown out the noise, and a minute or two later my mom comes downstairs in this skimpy nightgown to ask me why the TV was so loud and, seeing the horror on my face, kept asking what was wrong with me. FML
Today, my mom came into my room to yell at me because she thought she heard me having sex, saying I'm too young for it. I'm 23 and I wasn't having sex. The noises were from my dad watching porn in the next room. FML
Today, I was watching Euphoria’s new season and my mom barged in without knocking to ask me something. At that precise moment, a very explicit sex scene came on. She threw a bitch fit, tore up my prom ticket and told me that I ever lose my virginity while living under her roof, she’ll kick me out of the house. FML
Today, my mum was watching a program about sexually transmitted diseases. Later on, she started telling me that I should be careful and use the right protection when having sex. Suddenly she stopped and said, "Actually, I don’t know why I’m telling you this, you don’t have a boyfriend!" FML
Today, I was watching anime in my room when my mom walked in with fresh laundry. It would've been fine at literally any other moment, but the scene on at the time involved girls groping each other in a hot spring. Now she's accusing me of being in cartoon porn. FML
Today, my mom bitched me out, calling me a selfish pig and saying that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm so conceited. All of this because I started watching the latest episodes of Breaking Bad without her. FML
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Top comments
RebornProblem 0
She needs to get laid.
mismonroe 0
Correct her; you are not curious, you're actually quite the pro.
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Comments (320)
Suzumebachi 5
Favorite show!!! Sex Drugs, vampires, witches, fairies, everything I love!
horrorfreak79nj 2
Is your mom overprotective and/or overly religious ? If so, tell her God himself pulled himself out of non-existence just so he could exist & tell you to inform her what an absolute embarrassment she is to her beliefs. ... and that he himself wishes he could jack off in her face solely to see her reaction.
cloudndh91 1
that's ****** up. I would have just told her "that would mean I'm thinking about it doing it b/c I have not don it yet and what do you think I do with my boyfriend on the weekends?"
my2centsworth 15
Perhaps now you'll have more free time to explore the object of your curiosity.
angel42_fml 0
time to move out!
mike410 0
she should take your tv away just for watching true blood
HomeAl0ne 20
To all the worried mums out there reading this - Yes, if you think your child is getting a bit curious about sex, you should absolutely take away their TV but leave them with internet access. That will fix the problem.
caustin31 0
u still live with your mother?!! get outta tha house
demiilala 0
haha my Mum recommended I watch it when I was 16 because she loved it so much!
thecovert 7
Serves you ~~~~~~~ right. 7 letters, rhymes with trucking.
kings1fan 6
haha I say that's what you get! my grandma says "serves you right"