Today, my girlfriend dumped me after I told her I was learning how to start having lucid dreams. She was convinced the only reason I could possibly want to have them was so I could cheat on her in my own dreams. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, the girl of my dreams that I've been dating for months called me. Apparently she's been having recurring nightmares of me cheating on her. She dumped me "just in case." FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5am to tell me she was mad at me. Apparently I did something bad in her dream. She still won't talk to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of a year broke up with me because I didn't fight some guy that started hitting her right in front of me... In a dream. She was totally serious. FML
Today, my girlfriend of a year broke up with me because I got her pregnant and didn't own up to it. I wouldn't have blamed her if it didn't actually happen in her dream. FML
Today, I woke up from an amazing dream I was having about my girlfriend. We were laughing and holding hands, the kind of dream I wanted to stay asleep for. When I finally got up, I was excited to tell her about the dream but then I remembered. We broke up a week ago. FML
Today, I got woken up and kicked out of bed. Apparently if I cheat in her dreams it still counts. FML
Today, I woke up after having a nightmare that my girlfriend broke up with me. Needing reassurance, I told her about it. She became furious with me saying that she'd never do that and called me an "inconsiderate fucking bastard for even thinking that." Then she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for a familiar reason; I apparently have night terrors that make me "Impossible to sleep in the same room with." I don't ever remember these dreams. Every other girlfriend I've had has ended up breaking things off with me for the same reason. FML
Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she suspected me of cheating. She thought I was cheating because she caught me sneaking out in the middle of the night. I was sneaking out to plan my proposal to her. FML
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Top comments
razoray9 22
Well, does it work? How do you have lucid dreams?
YaBoiSeabass 15
Well now you can have three ways with Alexis Texas and Mia Khalifa
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Comments (50)
Catdragon 40
Well the only time I had a lucid dream, I stopped the normal path of the dream, spawned in one of my fictional crushes and had sex with them. It was so awesome and one of the best dreams I ever had. I rarely have good dreams, most of them are weird and some of them are bad. I dream almost every single night. Good luck on learning how to trigger it!
Saraishi 25
How much insecure and self-centered can a person get? I mean, seriously....
HRose 2
So, today, your crazy (now) ex-girlfriend did you the best favor of your life and spared you the horror of being with someone like her for any longer. Congrats, OP! Happy for you.
EvilLittleMan 23
She's a few french fries short of a Happy Meal. Be glad she's an ex.
LyricaSilvan 30
I'm no expert, but it sounds like your girlfriend is either an idiot, or was looking for an excuse.
zaidthunder1 27
Lucid Dreaming is pretty cool, not a very easy skill to master.
themostunlucky_fml 14
Sounds like you dodged a bullet
neobz 9
sounds like you dodged a bullet there op good luck
kyrisonfusion 22
The good news is, you got to dodge some crazy.... Not all bad
goozeo 11
Sounds like she's been dreaming of cheating on you herself for a really long time