Today, my family and I were decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed a bit unstable, but we decorated it without any problems. Later, while my daughter sat by the tree, it began to fall. Her grandmother stopped the tree from hitting her. I, on the other hand, screamed like a little girl. I'm a 38 year-old guy. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my kid jumped from the couch into our Christmas tree. As she literally slid down the entire tree, it was like it was happening in slow motion. I was laughing so hard, I peed myself, so I had to clean up decorations and my own piss. FML
Today, I was wrapping presents for my daughter, trying to be really quiet. Behind me, the cat decided to climb the tree, which then fell on top of me and I couldn't move. My daughter had to help me up. She now knows everything she's getting for Christmas this year. FML
Today, we spent hours decorating the Christmas tree, perfectly balancing the lights, ornaments, and tinsel. Ten minutes later, the cat thought it was a right time to reenact Die Hard and climbed up the tree, knocking it over. Now my ornaments are shattered, and my cat is smugly sitting in the wreckage. FML
Today, I was at Home Depot getting a Christmas tree with my family. While picking out a tree, a man thought it would be nice to help cut off the string that held the tree together. The branches hit me in the face and the guy managed to cut my hand. FML
Today, after spending hours putting up our tree and decorating it, it fell over and shattered the glass ornaments. FML
Today, our Christmas tree was damaged beyond repair after my son and his friends borrowed it for a little experiment. They tied balloons to the branches and tried to make it fly, after seeing a similar video online. FML
Today, I bought a Christmas tree and carried it up three flights of stairs alone. I finally got it inside, only to realize it was too tall. I tried trimming it, but now it’s crooked, shedding everywhere, and leaning like it gave up on life. I hope the greenish marks on the ceiling won't be permanent. FML
Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML
Today, I spent 15 minutes trying to get my cat out of our seven-foot Christmas tree. Once he was done, he tore about the house and broke the nativity scene, beheading baby Jesus and a wise man in the process. The tree is fucked. FML
Today, my family and I were burning our Christmas tree. For a laugh, my dad jokingly pushed me toward the fire. I tripped, and my doctor says the burns are probably going to scar. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
roaminginsomniac 0
Sounds about right. Men usually scream like little girls.
fishness 0
Hahaha, my Christmas tree fell on me when I was 6.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (75)
HyperExecuter 0
if we ever meet I'll **** u up u little pussy
Levity 0
I wish i had the balls to stand and watch a child get attacked by a christmas tree, but alas I dont think i do... Also, if the tree is unstable, why add weight to it? Did you think it would magically become stable as you added ornaments onto it?
skittleface 0
When you wrote "attacked by a christmas tree" I laughed. Couldnt help it. Thats some good imagery right there. XD
Levity 0
tx, i try my best :P when i thought of it i had the image of those singing christmas trees, just a giant one saying "Nom nom nom, i like to eat girls" think of that one however you may ; )
schwinn11 0
Wow, thank god grandma was around. And lucky it was a Christmas tree and and not a bus! Way to go superdad!!!!
imanethesmart 0
r u pagan? Christmas is pagan.
JamesGray 0
Eh? Christmas is the christian holiday made up to coincide with pagan holidays from the past... but what the hell are you talking about?
blaaaargh 0
I laaaav men who screams like litttle girls. -bursts out laughing-
youdeservedit1 0
I don't think its a fyl, I just think its funny
t4y10r 0
I'm so sick of these gender stereotypes. People vary. Old ladies can be perfectly capable of saving their grandchildren from Christmas trees. Men can be afraid. &Little girls don't scream any more than little boys do. **** you, OP.
brada81 0
Just because the OP said he screamed like a little girl doesn't mean that he was using gender stereotypes. What he meant was that when he screamed it was a high pitched tone. Don't want to use gender stereotypes myself and offend you, but if you haven't noticed men usually have deeper voices than females. So before you decided to get all pissed off and start shouting at other people maybe you should stop and think for once. Moron
fishness 0
Note that both the OP and #25 used the qualifier LITTLE... pretty sure that LITTLE boys' voices haven't changed yet, hence why #25 is correct in saying that little boys and little girls scream the same. Also, go take a gender studies course before you call anyone else an idiot for being correct about stereotypes. Please.
fudrick 0
I'm pretty sure little girls still have higher voices than little boys.
skittleface 0
nope. Little girls and little boys voices are generally the same in pitch. however the inflictions may be different. Thank you early childhood development classes.
sweatteaforme001 0
I'm glad someone else noticed this. Neither gender is inherently braver or more capable of saving the day than the other. Its 2009 (almost 2010). Time for the stupid, antiquated gender roles to die.
LilaBear 2
this isn't about stereotypes, it's about the OP (regardless of being a man or woman) being whimpy enough to stand by and scream while a christmas tree almost falls on a child. But while we're on the topic of stereotypes, little girls do actually scream more than little boys. I work with kids. I know this for a fact.
wow18 3
I worked at boys and girls club with kids from 5 to 11 and boys and girls do scream the same amount. When they hit double digits, then girls might scream a little more and in higher pitched voice than men but not kids ranging from 5-11 I'm not calling you a liar but what you stated is not a fact, but just the kids you work with.
WHOWASTHEPHONE 10
Do you mean **** OP's life?
LemonStarship 5
Did you scream like Fred? That wouldve been great.
jonny2x4 0
Turn in your man card NOW you sissy.
Kira_fml 0
"turn in your man card now you sissy" ??? good luck with that in the real world, you ******* moron. this is a ridiculous post. be glad your daughter's okay and move on. idiot.
cindayy77 0
*sigh* he's just rping, which is weird, really weird.. xD