That was my first thought.

I think the dad must have. If he only said "no, you don't have my permission" I doubt it would have ended like that. There is a reason why her dad wont tell her what happened, and I think her best bet would be to as her now ex-boyfriend.

Exactly! :)

I don't understand the problem with the asking her father. It's mostly done these days to get approval of the relationship, to get on the parent's good side, and to show respect. What's so bad about that?

What the hell are you talking about? These days, asking for the father's blessing is less about "asking for permission", and more about being polite/making a nice gesture. My husband asked for my dad's blessing to propose to me. So does that mean I'm an "embarassment to women everywhere"? You are unbelievably ignorant.

Then let me ask you this: why is it (usually) the father who gets asked, not the mother? Why does the girlfriend's parents (usually) not get asked? You are clearly ignorant about the abusive history of this tradition and the continuing harm it has on today's society.

A question is harming society? Jesus...your head must be so far up your ass that you can't even find it on Apple Maps. So does having the woman make majority of the wedding plans explain world hunger for you as well? How about hurricanes and earthquakes...are they caused by males generally being the ones to propose?

I will say, for the second time now, THE GIRLFRIEND'S PARENTS DO GET ASKED. I'm sure some boyfriend's do ask the mom as well, you probably just don't hear about it as often. You are correct- I am not aware of the "abusive" history of this tradition. But guess what? My husband asked for my father's blessing, and all hell didn't break loose. A few of my friend's husbands asked for the father's blessing, too. Clearly a new idea about this custom is forming, and you are too narrow minded to see it.

I would also like to point out that studies have been done proving that swearing actually helps get your point across. it adds emphasis and makes the statement more memorable if done... tastefully :) Kyleekay, I couldn't agree with you more :)

20, you are seriously an idiot. My dad would be extremely disappointed if my boyfriend didn't ask for his blessing to propose and he doesn't consider me property at all. I'm his baby girl, and be wants to know that my boyfriend will be good enough for me. Being POLITE enough to ask him and/or my mother first to bless our union makes a wonderful impression and shows that my boyfriend is respectful of the fact that my father would appreciate the gesture. Stop being a pushy asshole and trash talking a perfectly acceptable traditional thing. It's not hurting society in any way in this day and time.

Asking for the fathers blessing is a very old fashioned thing to do. It's a sign of respect to not only the father, but to the girl as well. It's not saying she is her fathers property because she still has a choice to say yes or no.

Ideasrule - Sorry, but you've got it all wrong. It's not harmful, disrespectful, sexist, or any of the other silly things you've called it. It's a sign of respect for both the woman and her father. Why the father? The same reason the woman's family generally pay for the ceremony. The same reason brides wear white dresses. The same reason brides are "given away": Tradition.

I thought there was a difference between asking for a blessing and, as OP said, asking for her hand. Isn't asking for her hand used when the woman is a minor, and blessing used when she is an adult?

outoftown: Your common sense is so completely detatched that I'm suprised you could even find this site.