Today, it's my 30th birthday. My husband came home with a big case of beer for himself, then told me he didn't have time to get me a present because of work. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Happy anniversary!
Today, it's my husband's and my first wedding anniversary. I came home from work hoping for at least a bouquet of flowers, only to find my husband passed out on the couch, with a few beer cans next to him. I guess I missed the party. FML
Kinda sus
Today, it's my birthday. My husband said he had to work today and “rain checked” my birthday celebration for “god knows when, because I’m so busy. I’ll let you know.” A couple of months ago it was his female work bestie’s birthday and he got her a cake, balloon, flowers, and requested time off to take her out for lunch. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML
Today, my husband stood me up for his birthday dinner, that I'd made, in our house. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I worked late, so I was looking forward to spending a quiet evening with my husband. When he suggested we go grocery shopping, I got excited thinking he had organized a surprise party or something. He actually just took me grocery shopping. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML
Inappropriate crush
Today, a week after my 10-year anniversary, I realized I've somehow been roped into hosting my husband's crush's birthday party with all their friends. My gift to myself was a $60 bottle of whiskey that won't arrive in time to help me with my debilitating social anxiety. FML
Where are you?
Today, it's my birthday. After I chose a restaurant, made a reservation, and organised a babysitter, I've been sitting here alone for over an hour, still waiting for my husband to show up. FML
Today, after my husband said he forgot our anniversary 2 days ago because he was so focused on planning for today, he forgot what was so important about today. It's my birthday. FML
Caked and baked
Today, I came home to my drunk husband, to find that he raided our fridge and freezer to soothe his beer munchies. That would have been fine, had he not eaten the top tier of our wedding cake I'd been saving to eat on our first wedding anniversary, which is in 4 days. FML
Top comments
Tripartita 45
Oh, yeah, when I was employed as a Selfish Prick, it made gift giving extremely difficult. The pay wasn't even that good.
Psycocharger 19
So rude of him!!! You should hide his beer for revenge >:)
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Comments (83)
Kartar115 22
that's so rude of him. if I were you I would give him the silent treatment
leogachi 15
@1 The silent treatment only drives a wedge between you and your partner.
Ichiya 29
Drink his beer then tickle him until he explodes.
Shadowpartner 11
lol why is a comment with -6 votes on top comment?
qwertydude1 19
Why is your comment even a comment?
cheeeksss 29
Honestly, what does the silent treatment do? Does it resolve the problem? Does it make the situation better than it is?
Mathalamus 25
I might make the guilty person feel, well, guilty. And try to fix it. For most though, it will just piss them off for being a child.
JayGatsby 25
Top comment isn't in order of likes, it's in order of who commented the quickest after the FML was published.
OSMC 10
*chants* steal his beer, lock the doors, iits a birthday movie marathon! *chants*
nameisname 12
Same reason yours is
threer 30
Honestly, that's so selfish. You deserve better.
Utetopia2014 18
What do you base that on? Do you personally know OP to know that she deserves better? Maybe her husband literally *is* working a lot, and likes to have a couple of beers after work? Maybe he works shit hours, or long hours? Maybe the preference would be to spend a whole day shopping for her, to get a nice present, and he doesn't have that time. She mentioned he bought a case of beer, but didnt have TIME to get her a present. Maybe the liquor store is right next to his work, and is super convenient. If he bought home a case of beer, and said "I don't have the money to buy you a present", then fine.. fml. There's a difference between time and money. I'll hardly even go into the reason we celebrate birthdays. All it means is you survived another trip around the sun. But maybe OP's husband surprises her with gifts, and nights out, on other days of the year. What makes a birthday so special? Maybe OP's husband is planning on a surprise dinner out at a restaurant when the two of them are free? Maybe it's booked? Maybe saying he "didnt have time" is a way hide the surprise? So... with the limited information we have... do you still think she deserves better? Or is that just a standard "fml comment"?
MariaGiovanni 25
#33 you need to take a deep breath and an Internet break....
TH_Insomniak 15
I think 33 needs someone to talk to..
Utetopia2014 18
Not really #37 & #43. I just dont look at things only on face value. Mostly you need to ask more questions. You need to find out more information. Never just accept things as they are when there's information thats left unsaid..
sylvienoir 18
No one is going to put that much effort into finding out the context of an FML.
Algorithm 24
Celebrating someone's birthday is a nice thing to do for someone, 33, and you buy them a present because that's how birthdays go. On his, she'd do the same for him. We all get one. Are you an adult? Don't you know why birthdays are important to people? "But maybe she wouldn't and maybe he tried to get her a birthday present but aliens abducted him and he had to fight his way home and their only weakness is beer and--" Stop. He's a dude who, from the only information we're likely to get, didn't do anything for OP on the one day a year that should be about celebrating her existence, and instead gave a flimsy excuse. Her birthday present, on the one day in an entire year where he could have the appropriate opportunity and obligation to give it, was less important to him than beer he could buy on the other 364. That's just awful. If alcohol is so extremely paramount to either you or him that it makes sense to skip out on someone's birthday for it...maybe you need to reevaluate your relationship with it along with how you treat other people.
Algorithm 24
And for the record, I was busy on my fiancee's birthday this year until 9 pm with no way of getting out of it. Instead of coming home with excuses and booze, I just asked if she wanted to celebrate it on Wednesday instead.
shortcake18 15
She was just saying that her boyfriend should have done something because maybe being another year older is "just one more trip around the sun" but it mattered to her and she wanted her boyfriend to show that he cared.
oiler 21
Honestly OP should just do the same
Dynosaur_dollie 38
In all honesty surviving another full trip around the sun is something to celebrate. Nothing killed you in that whole year, I can bet more than a few things came close weather you know it or not. I've lost so many people over the years to everything from drunk drivers to cancer.. my birthday comes around and you can bet I'll be celebrating.
dgv 13
And people say chivalry is dead!
Kartar115 22
rude >:(
leogachi 15
@4 What's rude? The sarcastic joke?
Psycocharger 19
So rude of him!!! You should hide his beer for revenge >:)
smokecloud_ 37
I'd hide it in my belly.
cheeeksss 29
I would drink it all and then tell him he can pleasure himself from now on.
MariaGiovanni 25
Grab the beer. "Thanks for my birthday gift."
pandor_fml 24
Gather up the girls and go party, stuff him!
derpina72 23
If my husband did that to me, I'd just drink all his beer!
Myo_fml 20
Yep. That case would automatically become my present.
ShadowStarEXE 35
When his birthday rolls around, buy yourself something and tell him the same thing. :)
muhnuqqa15 9
Tis not the goal though, a relationship shouldn't be spiteful.
Tripartita 45
Oh, yeah, when I was employed as a Selfish Prick, it made gift giving extremely difficult. The pay wasn't even that good.
nyf137 20
Oh, and I'd be willing to bet the benefits were terrible as well
olpally 33
Just drink his beer. What an ass.
orphanclubber 8
That sucks OP, sit down and talk with him, and if he still doesn't admit he's wrong, then ignore his next birthday?