Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the grocery store. My checker was very hot. When it came time for me to pay, I swiped my debit card and the machine kept rejecting it. Sure that I had money in my account, I did it again, before the cute checker informed me that I was swiping my driver's license, not my debit card. FML
Today, at a supermarket self-checkout, I loudly complained to the machine, “Why won’t you scan, you useless idiot?” An employee walked up behind me and said, “You need to press ‘Start.’” FML
Today, I was using self-checkout at the grocery store, and the machine flipped out and started randomly announcing, "Please wait for assistance." No one came to help, but the machine just kept loudly repeating it until everyone stared at me like I was trying to steal grapes. FML
Today, I was paying for groceries when the cashier asked if I wanted cash back. I said yes and handed over my card. She stared at me and said, “You're using a library card.” I'd pulled the wrong card out of my wallet. FML
Today, I spent twenty minutes helping an elderly man figure out how to use the self-checkout. When we'd finished, he smiled, thanked me, then walked away… without paying for any of his groceries. The cashier assumed I was with him. FML
Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said, "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?" I said, "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?" She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML
Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML
Today, I went to the self-checkout line at Walmart. When I tried to pay, the cash wouldn't go in, so I stood there trying to cram money into the thing that's supposed to take your money. What I didn't realize was that there was a sign up top that said: "No Cash. Cards Only." FML
Today, I was waiting in line for what seemed like forever at the only open lane at the grocery store. The guy in front of me took his sweet time and had multiple cards rejected, before finally pulling out a $100 bill and demanding exact change. He was buying a carton of milk. FML
Today, I had an extremely embarrassing moment when I tried to pay my restaurant bill. First, I tried swiping my card, only for it not to work. After the cashier suggested I insert my chip card, I tried putting it on the bottom, only for it not to be there. I finished by putting the card in the proper place upside-down. FML
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Top comments
null_fml 11
Congratulations! You are EVERYTHING customer service industry workers hate.
ZawWry 0
You claim the machine is stupid,but it is YOU who is stupid.
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Comments (52)
LilaBear 2
You swiped it quickly ten times? If it doesn't work when swiping quickly the first time, wouldn't you try swiping it slower? I always find when the eftpos machine doesn't read my card, swiping it slower usually helps (not painfully slowly of course, just steadier). And then when it doesn't work after 2 or 3 attempts, I usually switch it around just in case.
ZawWry 0
You claim the machine is stupid,but it is YOU who is stupid.
null_fml 11
Adam, Natalie, can you two cut this shit out or what? There have been 18 comments on this FML, and 16 of them (all of yours) were a grammatical nightmare of irrelevant immaturity.
xxxNataliexxx 0
Lmao whatever:)
nikkers 0
hah OP I have done this exact thing but normally realised my fault before abusing staff....
Norwegian_Wood 4
OP, next time, look more carefully. They almost always have a picture, so its really not that difficult. Usually, the magnetic strip faces either left, or down, depending on the pad. Sadly, as a cashier at walgreens, I've even seen people slide their cards without the magnetic strip being slid. And that's the whole point of the card. D: Its ridiculous.
pegasus77 0
Ah a fellow Walgreens employee =] I know the feeling. Its always old people, though.
Rainhawk94 27
I literally can't make it easier for people, unless we slide for them
frankgrimes 4
OMG BECKY LOOK AT HER BUTT< IT IS SO BIG. thats what you sound like you lame
nikkers 0
i like big butts n i cannot lie... falala alllaaa something along those lines...
Norwegian_Wood 4
You otha brothas can't deny When a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist and a big thing in your face you get SPRUNG! Bahahaha. xD
willowpuff 0
I work at tills with these machines and my god, I hate the twits who can't get the card the right way round. There's even a drawing on the machine. YDI
sparkey0127 0
stupidity at it's finest right here
BeeSkwaird 0
Ladies and gentlemen, this is what we call irony.
perdix 31
I'm sure he was turned off when you became frustrated so quickly. He probably thought you were hot, too, but didn't want to see you fly off the handle when he sticks it in the wrong hole.