Today, I went to Lidl to buy the cheapest jaffa cakes I could. They cost 35p. When I was eating them later on I put the plastic wrapper onto the side. When I'd finished eating my jaffa cakes I went to pick up the wrapper... The dog had eaten it. Cost me a £150 vet bill. Most expensive jaffas I've ever had. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally realized why my 9-week-old puppy was going to the bathroom so much. I went to pick up the food bag and realized she had chewed a hole in the bottom, and eaten half of the bag in the last 4 days. Goodbye 30 pounds of dog food, and 100$ for a vet visit. FML
Today, I rushed my dog to the vet because he was foaming at the mouth. I returned home with a bill for $200 and a dog who apparently has a thing for marshmallows. FML
Today, I spent hours baking a multi-layered, detailed cake from scratch for my mom's birthday. It took two seconds for my dog to devour the cake while I picked up a spoon I dropped on the floor. FML
Today, while at my job in a candy store, a boy stuck his hand into the bin, contaminating the candy. As I politely explained that the dad had to purchase the affected candy he refused, yelled, then angrily agreed to buy them. The total cost of the candy with the extra pieces? $1.69. FML
Today, my mum decided to teach me a lesson about carelessly leaving my wallet about. She left it on the floor so our puppy could use it and its contents as a chew toy. I was almost impressed to discover that he can eat three £20 notes and still have room for debit cards. FML
Today, I went to a fast-food joint and ordered off the $1.00 menu to save money. Five hours later I go to the hospital with food-poisoning. After a whole day of not eating, crapping, puking, having tests, and a bunch of IV fluids, my $1.00 burger ended up costing me $2,000 in bills. Really. FML
Today, after having a hard week, I decided to order a pizza with an expensive milkshake. It slipped out of my hand in front of the lift. It went everywhere. I had nothing on me to clean it up with. Now I’m milkshakeless, down £5, and accidentally responsible for littering my accommodation. FML
Today, my dog had her stomach pumped because she ate some cookies. The 100 cookies I made for a bake sale to be exact. FML
Today, I had a hotdog. I thought the skin was a bit tough but ate it anyway. After reading the packaging later I found out that each hotdog has an individual plastic wrapper. I ate plastic. FML
Today, I came home to find my dog had learned how to open our fridge. He ate the birthday cake I was saving for a friend's surprise party, and to add insult to injury, he'd also apparently thrown the barely digested cake up all over my bed. FML
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Top comments
joshizzle3 1
Most foreign FML i've ever read
picturetaker 0
Wtf is a Jaffa?
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Comments (198)
EMR_fml 0
Lidi? Jaffa cake? 35p? Could one of you Brits help us Yanks out with these terms?
penizulaface 0
Lidls - a very cheap store where they stock several immatatory brands with products in packaging designed to look like more well known ones. Basically own brand shit; and they have everything in crates and random crap around the store, they dont really even have shelves. i went in there for a bottled water once, and they dont do evian, volvic - whatever. eww. jaffa cakes - personally i hate them. like sponge cake at the bottom, orange gelly in the middle and a thin layer of chocolate on top. orangey chocolatey mini buiscut cake. ew. 35p - thirty five pence. for jaffa cakes, thats cheap. theyre probably about £2 for a packet normally. thus, op will probably get food poisoning.
Shikamaru_fml 11
Lidl is a cheap supermarket in the UK. p = pence, 100 pence = £1 kinda like how 100 cents = $1
EMR_fml 0
Thanks for the explanation. Makes much more sense now.
Lydia1749 0
#20, OMG THEY DONT SELL EVIAN???? Why didn't you just give up living right there and then? Heaven forbid, you didn't actually get desperate enough to drink TAP water from the British Isles, did you? Hope you recovered from your cholera. A huge chunk of the world has no clean water whatsoever and you're complaining that a discount store doesn't sell overpriced mountain juice? Admittedly, other mineral water isn't as nice but for god's sake, have some kind of sense of proportion. I have consumed several bottles of Lidl 25p water and I am alive and well.
penizulaface 0
i mean they didnt have any plain water... they had flavoured shit. and i was out, so obviously i wouldnt have had access to tap water. some of us have these things called standards; if i would rather have something of higher quality and its in my power to get it, ill bloody well get it. dont cry because mummy rations your water.
_sophieee 0
ah lidl. its like the best cheap shop in bristol bar aldi in redfield ;D their cheap jaffa cakes are betterr than the actual ones i thinkk.. 35p is cheap!
DieterDerBlau 0
YDI for being british and eating wierd ass crap.
Nerry_fml 0
lmfao
proudstub 0
Well, I'm no Brit but .... Jaffas : a kind of cake (not the alien race in Star Gate SG-1) quite appreciated in the British Isles. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaffa_Cakes Lidl : a discount supermarket chain (famous in Europe), contrary to other low-cost grocery stores, their products ARE edible, hence the OP's buying the Jaffa at Lidl. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lidl 35p: about 57 US cents. (£1=$1.62) www.xe.xom Will Her Magesty's subjects please correct me if I'm wrong ?
proudstub 0
oops, too late; sorry
penizulaface 0
wait... ****... lidls... aldi. now IM confused. which is the blue one?
_sophieee 0
aldi is like from the same company as lidl, pretty much exactly the same. not sure why theres both of them lidl is the blue and yellow one, aldi is the blue and orange one.
IndieSinger 0
@#28 - No, they're definitely not the same company. They're both of German origin, but they're completely different companies. Although they're both supermarkets, they sell different brands.
Amkii 0
The spelling looks German. And I know for a fact Aldi is German.
Malagron 1
All I could think of was "Jaffa, Kree!"
Sonfang 19
Lol that's what poped in my head!
littlegolferboy 4
This comment wins the Internet!
satanicminnow1 1
Me too!
Xader 0
Agree w/131
PeggGirl 0
I've got ******* jaffa cakes in my coat pocket!
GroovyNapkins16 0
Spaced FTW!!!!!!!!!!!
Broeman 0
I don't know about the rest of you, but I have no idea what the hell jaffa cakes are.
annalondon 0
http://lmgtfy.com/ Let Me Google That For You - could become your best friend as a moderator of this site!
K66J 0
YUMMM I LOVE ME SOME JAFFA CAKES
omgznoes 0
so you speak our language but dont have a clue what our currency 35p is essentially 35cents if you ignore the exchange rate
synacious 0
I'm from America and I know what Jaffa Cakes are; I eat them and I know various places to buy them. I apologize that some idiots give America a bad name by being so ethnocentric. Even if you don't know what they are, typing a word or two into a search engine is not hard, people. In any case, you have no idea what you are missing. I swear, the UK has some of the most amazing biscuits and candy bars; thank God for import candy shops. The closest thing we have to Jaffa Cakes are LU Pims.