Today, I was on drive-thru where I work. Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through. A woman came in and I noticed her dog. Without a thought, I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one. I looked again. The 'dog' was her daughter. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was so tired at the pet store I was working at that I accidentally offered a kid a dog treat instead of their dog. He ate it. While his mom watched. FML
Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML
Today, I saw a girl asking for money on the median of an entrance to a parking lot with her dog. Later, I bought a box of dog treats for her. I drove up and handed it to her. She rolled her eyes and said, "How the hell am I supposed to carry that?" I sat there in stunned disbelief with the box she refused to take. FML
Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I said no, she started crying so much that her mom came out 5 minutes later and demanded that I give her daughter the dog. FML
Today, I was at QuickTrip. As I was leaving, I passed a woman who was saying, "Stay!" very sternly through her open driver's side door. I smiled as I passed, saying, "Your dog wants to follow you huh? I've been there." She glared at me and said, "No. That's my son. He's mentally challenged." FML
Today, while I was working at a supermarket, a kid started to cry in line because he couldn't get candy. Since we have free lollipops behind the desk, I gave him one. His mom complained to my manager and said I was grooming her child. FML
Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman said, "Nice dog!" Without thinking, I replied, "You too!" FML
Today, while shopping for groceries, a small child pointed at my face and exclaimed : "DOGGIE!" FML
Today, I was out walking my dog, when a lady called out to me asking, “Is that a boy or a girl?” Assuming she meant the dog, I told her that he was a boy. When I turned away, I heard her say to her kid, “I was talking about the person walking the dog, but whatever,” then audibly laughing. FML
Today, my mom was "that" customer at the local drive-thru. She slipped into attention whore mode and bitched the guy out for not giving us extra fries. He said she didn't ask for any, which was true. Instead of apologizing, she swore at him and floored the gas, sending our drinks spilling all over me. FML
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Top comments
Confused77 3
That's ruff..
aatas187 8
Either that was a rather hairy/ugly child or you are in desperate need of an eye exam. Good for you on being dog friendly though.
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Comments (133)
samaraperez 7
ohh wow
jaredfry17 7
I question how you could mix those.?
mattrd_fml 31
that's dog gone funny!
Roughlife28 7
That's pretty much an every day occurrence for me...
alexwow1 13
Hilarious lmao
thebomb553 5
Just play it off as if you thought you saw a dog in the backseat.
mariepastyglue 30
That's pretty wild, but really you mistaking a dog for a human, either you have an eye problem, or this really is an FML for the dog looking girl!!
ShakeDisPlace 10
You work at McDonalds I bet!
uoeno_fml 20
That word has gone way over everyone's heads...including mine
kalbrek009 20
Was she in a leash or something that led you to believe it was a dog, or do you need glasses?