Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up from another nightmare, this time drowning in a rogue wave. I could feel the water and rain. I could feel myself gasping for air as I don't know how to swim, and can barely float. I'm scared if I die in my sleep, I die for real. FML
Today, at the pool, I decided to face my fears and go off the high dive. I slipped off the edge and did a barrel roll into the pool while screaming like a little girl. FML
Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML
Today, I nearly drowned. I was at a wave pool for the first time and stupidly swam out to the deep end. When the waves turned on, I discovered I can't swim in rough water. Despite my yelling, "Help!" and flailing around, the lifeguard paid me no attention. My friend had to save me. FML
Today, while lifeguarding, I slipped and fell from my chair and onto the cement. Embarrassed and actually quite hurt, I tried to climb back up to the chair, but it tipped. I fell half onto the cement half into the pool, just before the chair landed on top of me. FML
Today, I had a nightmare where I was drowning in the ocean. Was it because I'm unable to swim in real life? Good guess, but no. It was actually because I forgot to close my bedroom door in real life, and my very fluffy cat entered and decided to lie down on my face. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dad screaming that the ship was sinking. I started freaking out before I realized that I was sleeping on my couch at home and was not in fact on a ship. FML
Today, at the beach, I swam pretty far out into the ocean. I ended up getting pummelled by the waves and got a painful cramp in my leg. The whole beach watched me flail and scream, while my friends rolled their eyes as they dragged me out of the water. FML
Today, I was at work as a lifeguard. The temperature was absolutely stifling, but I tried to tough it out. A couple of hours into my shift, I passed out, fell off my stand, and crashed into the water. Or so the medics tell me. FML
Today, while on vacation with my family, I went parasailing. Just as I was about to take off, the wind picked up and I got blown off course. I ended up crashing into a boat and had to be rescued by the coastguard. FML
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Top comments
NorfolkDude 2
Ewwww, you best take a shower after going in the kiddie pool because most likely you're covered in piss.
likewhoachea 0
HAHAH this is so funny!
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Comments (87)
Sa_Ku 0
What a moment. Oo
bexox 0
That's sooo funny! And so what if she was on a cruise! It was embarrassing. I don't think she is in a world of pain right now, it was just an amusing story! Geez! People are so critical of everything.
McLaughlane 0
LOL oh shiii. Yeah, that would scare the shit out of me too. I'd be hesitant to go on a cruise because of the fear of falling off. :/
FuzzMonkey09 0
Havent you people ever heard of a WIRELESS connection? You people are so damn critical. Probably jealous becasue you're not on a cruise.
jennaleighhh 0
#27 ... hilarious. #48, you can criticize people when you learn how to spell..."you" "doing" "Wrong" I personally think this is great. Probably not real, but I would pay good freaking money to see it happen.
shazady 0
why does everyone seem to think that this person's life is fantastic just because they're on a cruise? the story is still incredibly embarrassing and hilarious.
Cheyyyy 0
*dies from laughter* Oh, how I wish I could have witnessed that! XDDD
jayhawk63 0
#55...part of the expression is that it's typed that way.
reallyannoyed 0
Soooo, you like to fall asleep while watching children?
eschreib 0
hahahahahah this is very funny. i would have like to watch this