Today, I was meeting the mayor of a major city as part of an internship program. Seated directly in front of him during his presentation on the budget crisis, he unleashed an enormous, foul fart in front of the entire audience. And then blamed it on me, everyone believed him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidentally farted at a board meeting. My boss thought it came from the guy sitting next to me and gave him hell for being a pig. I was too mortified to say anything, even when the guy blamed it on me, which caused my boss to rage at him for lying and then to kick him out. FML
Today, I was at a big meeting at work. The CEO was reaming the hell out of us for our recent poor profits, when I accidentally let rip a vile fart. I was then subjected to a 10 minute tirade of abuse for "trying to be a funny man", and told that whatever small chance I had for a promotion is now gone. FML
Today, my boss let me sit in on a board meeting. It was awesome until the guy next to me let out a vile fart, then looked at me in disgust, causing the others to look at me in disgust too. When I told my boss what really happened, he told me to grow up and stop blaming the other guy. FML
Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML
Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML
Today, I was in a meeting at work, trying to keep my composure. I quietly shifted in my chair and accidentally let out a fart. It echoed in the conference room, and everyone stared at me in stunned silence. My boss sarcastically said, “Well, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.” FML
Today, the VP of my company stopped by my desk to personally deliver praise on my recent performance. I watched in helpless horror as the noxious fart I had just released slapped him in the face. He was too polite to leave but gagged through his entire speech. If farts can kill careers... FML
Today, I let out a huge fart during a job interview. I was the one conducting the interview. FML
Today, I farted A LOT during an exam, all silent, so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I'm now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML
Today, I was alone at the office. Having held it in all day, I let out the longest, worst-smelling fart of my life. The owner of the company, investigating the odd noise, opened my office door. When the stench hit him, he walked backwards all the way to his office, staring at me, in silence. FML
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Top comments
Fouisgras 0
OP should post what city, haha
raiderh808 0
Politicians lol
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Comments (69)
AUT_student 0
"Seated directly in front of him during his presentation on the budget crisis" How?? Not totally calling fake, but wouldn't he have been on stage/at a podium, so how do you sit in front of him in a way that he could actually point at you realistically??
XOfiestypixie 0
Um, like this: mayor at podium giving presentation: *farts* OP sitting in FRONT ROW of audience, middle seat: *thinking* ew, thats gross mayor: *points directly in front of him at OP* it was him!
beethoven_fml 0
don't worry bb they probably all knew it was him
nobeans6131 0
hey know you're known! you're on your way up my friend.
p0kegeek 4
38th
pinkpikachu 0
Well, he's a politician. What'd you expect?
Dashiell 0
goddamn democrats and their dishonest ways
0neiros 14
Seattle...And did he call the cops on you because you bought a car from a Jewelry store Robber, and the cops took your engagement ring as evidence when they arrested you? Today the Pacific NW Smells like Bullshit.
caltain 0
That's politics. Hot air, foul noise, and blaming the other guy.
jz4 0
haha wut a loser
hairspray666 0
Thanks, #43, for the play-by-play.