Today, I was in the elevator with my boss when I accidentally let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in a packed elevator when I heard a loud noise. I assumed someone had farted, so I tried to discreetly turn around and hold my breath. To my horror, the loud noise was actually the elevator malfunctioning and dropping a few floors. I made it even more awkward by holding my breath, and the guy next to me asked, “You good?” FML
Today, I was alone at the office. Having held it in all day, I let out the longest, worst-smelling fart of my life. The owner of the company, investigating the odd noise, opened my office door. When the stench hit him, he walked backwards all the way to his office, staring at me, in silence. FML
Today, I was in an elevator with a bunch of people in suits. It was so quiet, I tried to break the ice by joking, “So… who farted?” The doors opened immediately and everyone walked out without a word. I was left alone in my own shame. FML
Today, I was in an elevator going up to the 32nd floor when I felt the urge to let out a fart. Feeling like it was either fart now or have appendicitis, and that it would be quiet, I thought no one would notice. It wasn't silent. It was loud and proud, and the cute girl next to me started laughing uncontrollably. FML
Today, after working alone in a room all day, I let a fart sneak out. Just then, my drop dead gorgeous boss and two new girls walked in. I could literally see them hit the stench and cringe. FML
Today, I shared an elevator alone with an attractive co-worker. On our way up, she let out a loud, noxious rip. She covered her nose and mouth while giving me an accusing look, as I said with a straight face, "Excuse you." Later, I received a note from HR for harassment. FML
Today, I had a wet fart with liquid in my underwear that I could smell. I let the one guy in front of me take the elevator so he wouldn't smell me. When the next empty elevator showed up, seven people started lining up behind me. FML
Today, I wore flip-flops to work. Just as I walked onto the elevator, they made a sound very close to that of a fart. About 10 seconds later, some asshole let out a silent but deadly fart, earning me a bunch of disgusted looks. FML
Today, the guy who got off when the elevator's doors opened had a very embarrassed look on his face. I didn't think anything of it till the doors closed. Turns out he was running away from his deadly fart. FML
Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML
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Top comments
PrickHead 0
could of been worse... could of shit ur pants...
ryrywakaka 0
LOL you should sniff it all up . take it for the team
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Comments (307)
guitar_god7007 3
fired for attempted murder?
1_Classy_Hobo 0
BAHAHA. marinate In fumes. lolmao
emtae6307 4
should have said " It was you"
mooimafishabbey 0
oh come onnn y didn't u hold it?
mikeyflinner 0
i always fart in elevators girls think farting is cool don't they
night_saint 5
lmao stick it to the man!
xlil_miss_emo_x 6
just be happy you didn't "shard" (i think that's how it's spelled) because then it would have been obvious who farted and even more embarassing. But anyways FYL truely
ShakeMeDown 12
well if ur boss is a guy and you are girl.. you should proceed to get on your knees, un button your blouse, and.... well you know... kiss his shoes. what other choices do you have? :D
papalael 0
He will get a good souvenir when u get fired one day
Calyx_fml 22
Ydi. You could have gotten off and taken another one. Martyr.