Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and superiors as well as our clients. About two hours in I started playing with the lid of the pen I was using, next thing I saw was the lid flicking up and hitting my boss square in the middle of the head. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, during a presentation, I gestured too dramatically and launched my pen across the room. It bounced off the projector screen, hit my boss’s coffee cup, and splattered it across the conference table. Everyone froze while I jokingly apologized to the table. FML
Today, I was at work, when I got bored and started spinning around in my chair for a little fun. As I was spinning, I went to grab my phone. I missed and sent my phone flying, hitting my coworker in the face. My boss witnessed the whole thing. FML
Today, I was bored in a meeting, so I absentmindedly started flipping my phone like a fidget spinner. I lost grip, spun it towards the ground, then watched it slide across the floor directly to my manager's feet. FML
Today, at work, I leaned back in a chair too far, causing me to tip over and smash my head into a wall. If that wasn't enough damage, my boss keeps replaying the security footage to everyone I work with. My head hurts not from the fall, but the loud laughter that keeps coming from inside the office. FML
Today, my boss called to check if I was available for a last-minute meeting. Trying to sound professional, I sat up straight in my chair, only to forget I was sitting on a rolling chair with no lock. The chair slid back, I slipped off, and a loud crash echoed through the office. My boss asked if I was okay, and I tried pretending nothing happened. FML
Today, I had a lunch meeting with important people from my company. While drinking from my wine glass someone cracked a joke, causing me to snort a fountain of wine all over my lap, splashing the people next to me. The horrified look on my boss's face sitting opposite me said everything. FML
Today, I was bored at my office, so I started flicking my pencils at my door. My boss walked in right then to give me a raise for my "outstanding" work. She scared me so much when she walked in that I flicked a pencil right at her face. FML
Today, I tried to look productive in a meeting by nodding along, only to realize too late that I was actually nodding off. When my head dropped forward, it made a loud thud on my desk, and everyone stopped talking at once. FML
Today, I was at work copying some papers. The copier is below a shelf with lots of paper and signage, which suddenly flew off the hinge and hit me in the head as well as the copier. My boss ran in, asking, "Is the copier okay?" FML
Today, a coworker thought it would be funny to put a tack on my chair. When I sat down, it went directly into my butt. When I sprang up, I hit my head on a lamp. I then hit my head on my desk on the way down. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
FFML_314 12
Aha, my boyfriend was let go the day after a meeting. Apparently he farted and laughed about it. Try and keep your composure, OP.
ShallowWerewolf 0
BOOM! Headshot! Sorry, had to.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (60)
amerwin 3
Due to your constant fidgeting with penis shaped items, I can only conclude that you got fixated at the phallic stage of Freudian psychosexual development. I bet you also enjoy cylindrical foods, such as hot dogs, cucumbers, pickles etc.
catatonicsleep 17
I've never met anyone who can sit perfectly still for a whole 2 hour meeting, everyone fidgets/fiddles at some point, just OPs bad luck they hit the boss with a pen lid..
birds_fml 7
You're a grown man, OP, not a child. It's time to stop fidgeting.
thefallenoo 0
dude I totally did this to a teacher! only mine was with a ruberband
egoeclipse 0
I've down that before.
element_ae 0
lol @ #5 ...jon hunting? don't know what type of job yer looking for but each to their own!! hahaha..
JustHereBecause 0
this is kinda like the rubberband one.
RedPillSucks 33
I used to do this all the time, flick the pen around my thumb with the first two fingers. Next time, take the cap off first, or just nod off and snore like normal people do in boring meetings.
guyfromri 1
This is very serious. There has been a growing number of cases of this exact behavior. You are not alone and you are not acting on your own true accord. It's critical that you seek assistance with someone who specializes in the niche space of 8 year-olds who are large for their age and who masquerade as adults in the marketplace. If this does not apply, grow the hell up and try to learn something in those meetings, but first work your way back from taco bell to the inner sanctum.
somynamesjanae 0
it could be worse, you could of hit him in the eye.lol