Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, there was a horrible smell in my kitchen. I tried to find the source, but failed and had to leave for the day. That night, my brother informed me that the smell was coming from a dead mouse stuck in our toaster. FML
Today, I saw a bat in a cabinet. I slammed the cabinet as hard as I could, which knocked the bat off the door and got its head stuck between the two doors, decapitating it. Its two beady eyes were judging me. I haven't even had my coffee yet. FML
Today, I found out that I have mice because my landlady got rid of the community cats that were keeping them outside, and apparently my cats aren't taking care of them. I found out when I turned on my oven and my apartment was filled with an awful smell that turned out to be burning mouse crap. FML
Today, I baked a cake. After feeding it to my entire family, I opened the stove, planning to temporarily store the cake inside. I then noticed a mouse, burnt to a crisp. FML
Today, I finally found out what that weird smell in my apartment was. My ex-boyfriend had been breaking into my apartment and hiding rotting fruit all over the place. I found this out when a ceiling panel fell and a swarm of fruit flies attacked me. FML
Today, I was laying in bed when my sister came running in, scared. I took my bat and went into the kitchen where the suspicious noise was coming from. It was a rat, right in the middle of the floor. I jumped on the counter and shrieked, just as my girlfriend walked in, who then actually dealt with it. FML
Today, I walked into my apartment after work, only be to greeted by an awful smell. I searched every inch of the place, convinced something had died. After an hour of searching around, I found the source: a single forgotten boiled egg in one of my backpack's pockets. I will never forget the smell of sulphur or whatever it was. FML
Today, I found out that the horrific smell coming from somewhere in my kitchen was a rotting dead mouse that somehow got stuck in my dishwasher. I have been eating off plates washed in dead mouse water for the past week. FML
Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML
Today, I came home to the vilest stench I've ever smelled. I had to open a floor vent and scoop up the turd that was inside. Funnily enough, today was the day my scumbag roommate moved out, but I'm sure he had absolutely nothing to do with it. FML
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Top comments
tyler_mcdolan 10
Why would it even be necessary to kill it?
Musiclover1482 9
Why not just capture it and release it outside?? It would be less messy and more humane..
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Comments (293)
keerththana 13
Uhm , is your roomate FUKED UP?! wtf, I wish it was your roomate in the oven. People like that bitch doesnt deserve to live. Have fun when KARMA hits her!
Selke 16
That poor bat. That's an awful way to die. :-(
silvanawernli 5
oh...my....god :O haha in the microwave!
WeskersSexslave 15
poor dracula..
Hurley_fml 21
FYI: I never comment on here. Your roommate is a ******* disgusting excuse for a human being. That is animal cruelty. That poor bat was burned alive and suffered immense amounts of pain. Ask her how she would like to be roasted alive.
middlesister04 5
Oh ms. Animal rights. That bat would have been a goner too had it been in my apartment.
Solipsist 12
Congratulations on being a **** then.
slaarwalhz 4
Some species are endangered. If she killed one of those she can go to jail. She is so stupid. This post made me sad.
LalaDee561 8
I would either move out of that place or kick my roommate out and get a new one. There has to be something seriosuly wrong with someone who thinks that the proper way to handle a bat in your home is by ******* baking it. Poor thing. I would be SUPER pissed. Your roommate is crazy. If she would have at least kept it in the oven until a professional came to get it then it would have been ok, instead of making the poor thing die in such a horrible way. FYL and FTBL (F The Bats Life).
elenaunlucky 10
wow...u got a roasted bat for dinner. is your room mate psycho?
jonf502 6
I have a very racist joke but don't want to offend anyone and I respect Jewish people
middlesister04 5
Well since she most likely baked it to death, make her take it out and dump it.