Today, I uttered the phrase "the pot calling the kettle black" in class. Moments later, I'd been called a "racist twerp" and kicked out of class by the same English teacher who once tried to have another kid suspended for using the word "titillate", because apparently it's "pornographic". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, during a class, I noticed some racist statements and symbols on a table. While erasing them, I bent down to pick up my dropped pencil. I look back up to see a teacher, and got a suspension. FML
Today, my English teacher kicked me out of class for being "rude and disruptive." In actuality, I had called her out for having blatantly used Google Translate for several example sentences, all of which sounded as if a semi-literate foreigner had constructed them. FML
Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year-old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML
Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "That's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "Push a little harder" while dissecting a frog. FML
Today, I was once again berated by an idiotic parent. I’ve been called a filthy liberal, a groomer, and had my job threatened several times. All of this because I was teaching second graders about pronouns. You know, the part of English grammar that replaces a noun. Nothing political at all. FML
Today, I watched a movie my old teacher recommended me. She was one of my favourite teachers. I saw the title, opened it, and found out that the premise is racist towards my ethnic group. She marked me harshly. FML
Today, I finally had it with the redneck bully who's been tormenting me. He was repeatedly poking and pinching me and laughing out loud during class, so I slung him to the ground, pinning him. I got suspended. They only called his parents, who never do anything; my "caring" parents are looking into teen boot camp. FML
Today, I was in class. I am an older student going back for my PhD. I was kicked out of class for "sassing" my instructor for telling him he was wrong about what took place at an event I was actually present at. My instructor is a 22 year old TA. FML
Today, I was teaching and a boy sitting in front kept laughing and smiling, even after I asked him to cut it out. I got so annoyed that I jokingly said I'd knock his teeth out, and asked him to leave the class. The kid went to the principal and told him I intended to hurt him. I'm a college professor. FML
Today, I got called into the principal's office of my son's school. Why? He'd called his teacher a "fudge packer". No more weekends with his uncle. FML
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Top comments
Pwn17 25
I thought teachers were supposed to have some level of intelligence...
Mossears133 15
Then there's that awkward moment when 31 realizes this is in the UK.
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Comments (159)
trulymickeyj 13
Sorry, your teacher's really dumb. I hope you make it through.
Flaum 7
Try using the word "niggardly", and perhaps be ready to explain to her the etymology of that word in case she accuses you of being racist again.
datine22 7
Haha
UsernameAnxiety 14
This person is a teacher??
Kylienne 5
Not many people use cast iron anymore, it's such a great phrase but I also get a lot of odd looks when I use it . However I feel your English teacher should be familiar with it. Unfortunate.
TecheyTim 14
You guys are all f***ing idiots.....titilate means "to stimulate sexually" or "excite in a sexual fashion".
RocketNinjaFish 12
If ALL of us think otherwise, are you sure you're not the "f***ing idiot"?
mollyjynxjax 28
verb (used with object) tit·il·lat·ed, tit·il·lat·ing. to excite or arouse agreeably: to titillate the fancy.
Kozmotis 8
I see that Westboro Baptist members are teaching school now.
_DudeGuy_ 16
The teacher isn't wrong about the word titillate. Here is its definition: tit·il·late /ˈtitlˌāt/ Verb Stimulate or excite (someone), esp. in a sexual way It is sort of pornographic.
mollyjynxjax 28
verb (used with object) tit·il·lat·ed, tit·il·lat·ing. to excite or arouse agreeably: to titillate the fancy.
mattlw 25
You can't even say "black" any more in reference to black people. Hey, if you are African American, then by God you had better start referring to me as European American instead of... "Whitebread"
nightbirdblue 27
You can't say anything about anyone, unless they perceived to be the average, then you can say whatever you want. At least that is what my college social work course has taught me.
fuzz97 23
you should end his life