Today, I told my mom about the severe phobia I've developed towards driving. She was very supportive and even made me an appointment to see a psychologist. His office is two hours away. I have to drive to see my doctor about my fear of driving. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went driving for the first time with my mom. When she wasn't screaming, she gave great advice like, "Stop at the red light" and "Don't crash into cars". I need to drive 50 hours with her. FML
Today, my mom changed her mind about driving me to a job interview because she wants to attend a meeting at a church she told me she'd never go back to, full of people she hates. I can't drive because she refuses to teach me how. There's no public transportation. FML
Today, I finally convinced my mum to take me to a psychologist. As soon as he sat me down and asked me how I was doing, my mum burst into tears and went on a rant about how her life is terrible and she regrets everything. I was asked to sit in the waiting room. She used up my whole hour. FML
Today, my mother said she trusted me enough to go with me for my first drive in my new car. As soon as we got in the car, she started hyperventilating and screaming we're going to crash. I didn't even start the engine. FML
Today, while driving on the streets for the first time, my mom decided that it would be an appropriate time to yell at me for every single mistake I’ve ever made in my life. This stressed me out so much I began driving against traffic. FML
Today, my mom sternly told me that she would no longer make doctor's appointments for me, since I need to do them myself. I've been staring at the phone for thirty minutes, crying from anxiety. I'm 27 and the most pathetic man alive. FML
Today, I finally sought help for my crippling fear of elevators. When I arrived at my new therapist's office, I found the door to the stairs locked. To get to my appointment on the third floor of the building, I have to take the elevator. FML
Today, I spent hours arguing with my mother, who claimed I shouldn't make a three-hour drive because I wouldn't be able to concentrate for that long. I argued that I was a perfectly capable driver, and left. In the last two minutes of the journey, I hit a van, and messed up the front of my car. FML
Today, on my way to see my therapist, my father told me to lie to her and tell her that I'm happy so he wouldn't have to drive me there anymore. FML
Today, as usual, my mom got shitfaced and started berating me for something. This time, it was for missing a therapy appointment. Not only am I unable to drive, it was her appointment. For her alcoholism. FML
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Top comments
thatgirlinoregon 21
I bet that drives you crazy!
perdix 31
She's a financial wizard! For the price of one hour with the shrink, she's getting you four hours of desensitization training for free! Next, tell her of your profound phobia of having sex with several beautiful women at once.
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Comments (102)
SweetJTBR 22
Well you said you fear driving but, do you fear being a passenger in a car? If the answer is yes, look on the bright side, you are ****** :)
SweetJTBR 22
Or, you know, you could ride the subway. Perhaps take a train. You're not necessarily ******.
marmlr339 14
There is no bright side in your scrnario
SweetJTBR 22
I thought the smiley made it bright. It doesn't? Shit. Let me rewrite that then. "If the answer is yes, then look on the bright side, atleast if you walk everywhere from now on you'll be healthier" That better for you #29?
doctorhook86 25
My advice to cure phobia of driving: repeatedly expose yourself to the cost of taxi fare, OP.
JocelynKaulitz 28
Your psychologist was probably gonna make you do that anyways to help get rid of your phobia.
ddddddddg 9
Unless she's a pornstar I don't see how..forget it
citymayer 7
12 - Except that most of America doesn't have those luxuries..
_Oblivion_ 12
48 America has plenty of them. The New York City subway has 468 stations serving 24 subway lines - more than any other system in the world.
doctorhook86 25
65: Unfortunately, none of those lines go to, say, Buttfuck, AL.
GawdamitNappa 4
I think we need DocBastard's diagnosis on this one.
thatgirlinoregon 21
I bet that drives you crazy!
beccaishereyay 11
Maybe he can steer her in the right direction.
thatgirlinoregon 21
But won't the commute send her into reverse?
TrueTriage 16
Hey I see what y- *gets lynched*
thatgirlinoregon 21
I'm just scared things could take a turn for the worst.
thatgirlinoregon 21
If she works hard she can pave the way to recovery.
thatgirlinoregon 21
I just hope that OP doesn't get lost trying to take detours. It could really deflate previous progress.
MrBrightside21 20
40 - What robot always takes the longest route? R2 - Detour.
DRMIKA 4
As long as she has emotional drive, she will be okay
rajput 17
*insert bad pun here*
music_woman1 11
If she's supportive then wouldn't she offer to drive you? If not, why don't you ask her to drive you?
UberNova 18
I agree, but you know... She could always get a bus too.
Judahsh 8
A bus still drives
UberNova 18
She has a fear of driving, not being driven.
DontModMeDammit 10
Well that's one way to get over your fear... Maybe.
Unluckyducks1870_fml 4
Doesnt that put the brakes on a lot of your plans?
mightymart 5
Take à plane .. HAHAHA A PLANE! Thats funny!!!!
gmc_blossom 21
It really isn't. 0.o
KiddNYC1O 22
There's nothing funny about a plane! One of man's greatest creation!
eggmarie 25
She's making you drive that far so you get used to it and don't need the therapist. Perfect logic. (jk your mom is a silly pants)
Leslier_fml 4
So ask your mom or a friend to drive you there.
Rommel1942 9
Was your mom dropped on her head as a baby?
perdix 31
She's a financial wizard! For the price of one hour with the shrink, she's getting you four hours of desensitization training for free! Next, tell her of your profound phobia of having sex with several beautiful women at once.