Today, I missed my flight because I was stopped by airport security. They found "small, suspicious, spherical objects" in my purse on the X-ray. After pulling me out of line, taking my purse aside and carefully opening it with tongs, they removed the bag of grapes I had packed as a snack. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML
Today, I borrowed a friend's suitcase for a trip. At the airport, security pulled me aside because there was a small metal object inside. I opened the suitcase expecting something suspicious and found a potato peeler. My friend had used the suitcase for groceries the week before. FML
Today, after visiting my mom, she stuffed a bunch of pads in my backpack so I'd have some at my dorm. When I was going through security, I was stopped and ended up missing my flight. Apparently the jumbo pads my mom sent look exactly like packs of cocaine when they go through the X-ray machine. FML
Today, I packed my bags and left for the airport. When I passed through security, the X-ray scanner discovered that my cat had also come along for the ride. FML
Today, while going through airport security the lady asked why I folded everything so small. I said that I was going away for a month and needed to fit a lot of stuff in only one bag. She smiled, nodded and then dumped my luggage to search for "drugs and other illegal teen things." FML
Today, I was going through airport security. Trying to get things over and done with quickly, I dropped my pants without a second thought. Turns out they just wanted me to remove my shoes and belt. FML
Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year-old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML
Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML
Today, while going through customs at the airport, my bag was selected for screening. It was nearly overflowing because it was so full, so before the TSA agent searched it, I said, "Watch out - it's going to explode when you open it". Wrong choice of words. FML
Today, my mother-in-law had concealed in her suitcase a kitchen knife and plastic bags of MSG, salt, and other seasonings (AKA unidentified white powder) because she doesn’t trust foreign food, and wanted to cook her own food on holiday. Airport security were not amused and we missed our flight. FML
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Top comments
dino_witha_cape 0
yeah, if you bite into those things they could squirt someone's eye out
Jcsati8 0
If you pack baby carrots, will they think you are carrying ammo? Damn airport security!
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Comments (203)
gorka_fml 0
yeah, security is ridiculous i cant even bring my hunting rifles on board anymore
reyemrein 0
I know I hate how I can't put guns and throwing knives in my trenchcoat anymore without people staring at me And my RPG? Forget it!
Jcsati8 0
#9 I think the adjective you were trying to use was LUDICROUS, not a rapper.
MmmHotWaffles 0
now fruits are weapons.. what is the world coming to?
Antares_01 9
The whole concept of an explosive is that they show up orange under the x ray. Because they are an organic compound. Since grapes are as well, they'd show up orange on the screen as well. Being of a small round nature, it's only natural to assume , from looking at the screen, that it might be explosives.
Lauriebug 0
It's not ridiculous at all. In fact you aren't supposed to have any outside food period. They easily could've been filled with something. YDI.
noscope_ftw 0
yes because grapes are very easy to fill with enough explosive to case serious damage right?...
BabiiexElmo 0
I hate it when airports do that. ugh!!!!!
RyanRaygun 0
Stories like this are why I feel nervous flying in 2 weeks. It's not the 13 hours flying in a metal tube, it's the damn security. PS anal beads could have been funnier.
Lifey66 0
thats not so much an fml, just rather hilarious. and, y'know, Don't bring food or drinks next time.
ohhhhshizzz 0
#12: LMAO! OP: I bet they felt really idiotic, I would have laughed in their faces. Can you make them pay for your flight to where you were going? If so you should.
Kenji_fml 0
Yeah that sucks, but would you prefer flying with somebody who has grenades in his bag?
mynameisnotjudie 0
hahahahahahahaha @ #8 = D and # 12 FTW = p Still, you're not supposed to pack food = /