Today, I learned that I cannot cook or clean in my kitchen because it's too noisy for my neighbour. Every time I do, she bangs on the wall. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my upstairs neighbors filed a noise complaint against me for banging on the ceiling every night. They conveniently left out the part where they constantly stomp, shout, and do stuff that sounds like they're dropping bricks to the floor every night. FML
Today, I can't any peace and quiet in any room of my flat. The neighbours on one side are arguing, the other side are having very loud sex, the ones upstairs I suspect are playing some sort of games console, and downstairs daughter has been practising her violin badly all morning. FML
Today, I wore noise-canceling headphones while cleaning my apartment. Apparently I'd been singing at the top of my lungs for nearly an hour, because my neighbor knocked on my door just to ask if everything was OK. FML
Today, my new neighbours moved in. I had always thought my bedroom wall was soundproof, because my old neighbours never complained about my loud night terrors. Turns out they were just stone deaf. The new ones can hear everything. FML
Today, I now know why my next-door neighbour can't look me in the eye without smirking. He can hear every grunt, groan, fart and strain that happens in my bathroom from his bathroom. FML
Today, my downstairs neighbours screamed at me for making so much noise that I woke their children up and made them cry. The noise was the sound of a loose floorboard shifting as I crept to my bathroom, and again on my way back to bed. They've sworn to get me evicted. FML
Today, my mom realized that the "door" part in "screen door" doesn't block sound when she began to talk to our neighbours about how much of a failure I am. I heard everything. FML
Today, my neighbor knocked on my door and left a note that said "Please stop singing in the shower. You're terrible, and everyone in the building can hear you." FML
Today, my neighbor yelled “Fuck you!” at me through his window. My crime? Closing my front door “too loud.” This man lets his children beat on the walls and slam doors but apparently I’m the problem. FML
Today, I was singing while unloading my dishwasher. I heard a knock on the door and went to answer it only to find the police telling me they received noise complaints from my neighbors. I live next-door to my parents. FML
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Top comments
fifi125 21
Be more considerate. You don't need to eat, just live off the air you breathe. YDI.
aperron96 18
Unless you're baking at 2 am with chainsaws and a nail gun, that's unwarranted.
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Comments (77)
SilentSin 23
Just bang back. That's what I do
allforfun 23
And bang louder and longer. She'll stop.
oiler 21
should make a cool rythm of it
MariaGiovanni 25
She might call the cops and cause OP a huge problem. It sound slide they live in apartments to she could report it to the apartment manager and if that doesn't work record it and call the cops to have it documented then complain again to management. First rule of any adult conflict is document everything.
NoOrdinaryNZer 28
Damn seems like a great time to move elsewhere. Although I'm assuming you or her are new to the place. Sorry to hear op.
cheeeksss 29
I'm assuming OP would much rather just resolve this issue than have to move and alter their lives due to a silly problem.
NoOrdinaryNZer 28
Well if op has the problem with one person, it'll be the same with any new neighbors
ChopSuey444 20
#60 most people understand that others must cook and clean, and don't make a fuss about it. So, I disagree.
Stevethatguy 3
Why did this get so much dislikes? sure it's a little extreme but it was a idea or a suggestion
fifi125 21
Be more considerate. You don't need to eat, just live off the air you breathe. YDI.
Lalala579121 28
Yeah I agree. OP should just stop being a brat and learn photosynthesis. It's not that difficult.
chosha_fml 27
Osmosis: also very quiet.
mds9986 24
You can just filter feed! *starts taking deep breaths*
cheeeksss 29
Next thing you know, the neighbor will be banging for "breathing too loud"
Rawrshi 25
Just blast music. Then she won't hear you cooking or cleaning. I recommend heavy death metal just to be sure. c:
Kaalschneid 21
That's better than mine, telling her to go around, and that there's no door on this side. or shout in response "Come in!"
NYGiants1925 22
That sounds like something I'd do lol
mezochan 29
Sounds like you need to give your neighbor an early Christmas gift so you don't starve. Earplugs with a note saying you have a matching pair so you don't have to listen to her banging on the wall all the time.
restinpepperonis 13
You should randomly bang the wall and tell them to shut up continuously
shoower_fml 9
Bang on the door like Sheldon cooper, and if no one answers just keep doing it. Hahahaha
aperron96 18
Unless you're baking at 2 am with chainsaws and a nail gun, that's unwarranted.
skippydoda 32
I don't know how you bake, but chainsaws are kind of needed.
MDoremis 38
I've used an electric saw and drill before while baking--and it wasn't to build a cake stand.
OysterPearls 33
She deserves to get Chopped for turning your house into Hell's Kitchen.
tiger820 20
I see what you did there...
MonstreBelle 29
I hope this Kitchen Nightmare ends soon for OP
MrsPegg 45
Go have a talk with her. If that doesn't work, go to the manager/landlord. Then if she is relentless, just turn up some music to drown her out and take care of yourself. Eventually she'll get the point.
Mpii 11
YDI OP. People need to be able to live in absolute silence. You should be ashamed of your self for making so much noise! You should maybe eat your filth. That way you neither have to cook nor cleat.
AgentSkyeBarnes 16
#36 says the person who failed to recognize sarcasm