Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally let my parents meet a boyfriend of mine for the first time ever. My dad mentioned how he was happy to finally meet him, because for the past 4 years he'd thought I was gay. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my family for the first time. My mother's immediate reaction was, "We didn't know you were gay!" No mom, she really is a girl. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML
Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML
Today, I decided to introduce my girlfriend to my parents by telling them that we were gonna have a very special guest for dinner. While my mom was preparing the meal she asked, "What does he like?" I'm straight. My parents thought different. FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. My dad took one look at him, sighed and said, "You deserve someone better. Someone who is responsible, and has their priorities straight in life." Beyond upset, I told my dad that I love him. My dad disgruntledly responded, "I was talking to him." FML
Today, I came out to my parents. They nodded empathetically throughout my entire speech and told me repeatedly that it was okay. As I smiled and stood up, my dad asked, "But you're still going to marry a guy, right?" FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, my dad's face flushed when I introduced him to my new boyfriend. I live in a small town, and it turns out my dad recognized him. He's the secret child from an affair two decades ago. He's my half-brother. FML
Today, I came out to my parents as lesbian. Surprisingly, they were OK with it… just as long as I still marry a dude, give them grandbabies, and keep the whole lesbian thing a deep, dark, shameful secret that we never talk about again. FML
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Top comments
SimpleMinds_fml 7
Your dad is awesome.
speshlk37 13
Did your boyfriend go home and right a whiny song about it?
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Comments (359)
stevenmx86 8
Oh snap! How awesome is that lol Your dad rocks!
b_gallo 0
Lol so your bfs hot haha my parents still haven't found about my gfx)
bubo_fml 11
Shoulda said, "Nah Dad, she ain't gay...I let her suck my dick!"
corrinaswan 0
Ur dad is an ass but Ur bf must be hot if he's emo
SoCalKay 3
Lol I dated a few scene kids then I found a real man, army man. Best choice ever.
THE_A_TEEN 28
I'm bi, and "real men and army men" SUCK. Seriously...
FYLDeep 26
"Real men and army men suck", says the man who "hates stereotypes". Show me one emo band that is actually proficient at their instruments. I dare you. I'll even look them up if you give me their name.
THE_A_TEEN 28
My ex-girlfriends dad was a marine and I hated him because he hated me wth a passion (even though I respect the military) and everytime I see one, reminds me of her hardass military dad. Most real men, based on the comment I replied, are mostly straight and not openly G or B.
Rhondee 0
oh, so funny! I love your Dad's comment!
CoolStoryScrote 6
You deserve it for dating a transvestite
joee182 3
No matter who you are at one point in your life you tried to dress a certain way and were stereotyped people just need to stop judging a person by how they look and worry about themselves and not care what people say.
judo4ever 0
DAD=WIN!!!
This_war_is_ours 0
ahahahahahahahahahaha