Today, I had a plan. I was going to get up early, eat a well balanced breakfast, put on my workout clothes and enjoy this beautiful day with a fulfilling jog. Instead, I put on my workout clothes, spent hours on social media, ate a pizza, and ended up falling asleep on my couch. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was hyping myself up to work out after weeks of being a lazy slob. I slapped my workout gear on, got my Spotify playlist ready, and just as I was about to start, my friend texted me asking if I wanted pizza. I’m now in my workout clothes, eating pizza on his couch. FML
Today, I tried to be productive and got dressed in real clothes instead of sweatpants. I spent the next four hours on the couch binge-watching Netflix and pretending I had plans. FML
Today, I fully intended to start going to the gym so I set my alarm an hour early so I could go before work and get it over with. Alas, when the alarm went off and I saw that horrible "5 a.m." on my phone, my brain put me straight back to sleep without my consent. I ended up being late for work. FML
Today, I got up very early to join my fit, slim, husband for a morning walk, since I work from home, order food to be delivered, and barely leave the couch. Afterwards, he biked off to work, and I went straight back to bed. With some candy. Small steps, I guess. FML
Today, I went for a three-mile run. I was really proud of myself until I woke up from my dream in my bed, surrounded by empty soda bottles and fast food bags. I haven't worked out in years. FML
Today, I woke up early for an important team meeting I needed to attend. I washed, got changed, and sat down to eat breakfast. I then woke up again, an hour late and covered in cereal. FML
Today, I tried to go to the gym, but I ended up watching cat videos on YouTube for three hours. FML
Today, I was feeling really good about going to the gym for the first time. That was until I got so worn out from my “warm up” on the treadmill that I had to go home and spew. FML
Today, I organized a party at my place, invited 20 people, bought snacks and cancelled my workout. Nobody showed up. I ended up eating a whole ciabatta alone. FML
Today, in an effort to be more active, I jumped out of bed ready for a morning jog. Or, that was the plan. Instead, I twisted my knee so badly standing up, it's now locked, and I can't move it. So much for activity. FML
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Top comments
pixierara 28
*couch* I don't think you slept on your coach, I think he would have made you run
leafeon523 20
Ydi for not having motivation and complaining about it online.
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Comments (103)
leafeon523 20
Ydi for not having motivation and complaining about it online.
drunkmunkey 24
Assuming she meant couch then she deserves it, but if she really fell asleep on her coach then you know she at least burned off some of the pizza
davisjenny81 30
Exactly. Maybe now she'll learn to not say "I better check Instagram before I leave." That will probably resolve many issues like that in OP's life
JohnTheDonJuan 11
How can you spend hours on social media for ****'s sake? Get a damn life kid. No wonder you're a failure level 100.
santosb1 11
It's what my generation does brahhh, waste our life away with selfies and and pound signs, sorry hastags.
HuiEtyud 7
I thought that was the reason for the Internet. Huh.
pixierara 28
*couch* I don't think you slept on your coach, I think he would have made you run
lexos 16
Maybe she fell a sleep after some steaming warming up on the coach.
Zhilla 19
I read it to mean coach as in the vehicle
abNormal62 23
Congratulations I'm playing to your strengths
Hoboman69 15
If you don't put forth the effort, change will not happen. Just try each day to live a little healthier than yesterday, you can't change it all at once.
Isandri 29
And instead of planning it for the next day, just go for at least short jog, but tonight. works for me ;)
booze_n_bitches 37
Never too late for a jog OP, why not go now instead?
jerryj 27
Cause OP is a lazy bum!
doctorhook86 25
Take it from #5, OP! Her pics are proof she's fit.
abNormal62 23
Put me in coach! I'm ready to play?
ComoEsJuan 24
Play Xbox, maybe.
lulinator 40
*clap clap clap* Today!
wyverntail 15
We all wish we can do the things we tell ourselves to do. Welcome to the club * hands OP a slice of pizza*
Psycocharger 19
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Wow I saw this with all 0's (Comments, Deserves and Your Life Sucks)
peteto818 28
Good for you
clevergirl98 20
You can still workout, now you have some motivation, working off that yummy pizza!
VonBlitzkrieg 27
I don't see how this is anything other than your fault.