Today, I got my medical checkup back. Apparently, I'm diagnosed with a liver condition generally found in alcoholics. I've never drank in my life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after coming back from a trip to Africa where I got malaria, I went to the hospital for some blood tests. The doctor said, "Good news! You never had malaria! But they put you through a lot of dangerous treatments and now your liver has an anomaly." FML
Today, I found out why I get so red all over at parties. Turns out I'm allergic to alcohol. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with a condition that makes me lactate. I'm a 6' tattooed guy with a boxing competition coming up soon. I'm never going to hear the end of this. FML
Today, my physician, a known drunk himself, told me I was drinking too much and I should quit before my kidneys decide to divorce me and take the house and car with them. FML
Today, I found out my father didn't have a rare brain disease, and that he was just an alcoholic. I've been taking care of him every time his "brain disease" acts up, for 2 years. FML
Today, the guy I've been seeing decided to "test the theory" that I can't drink alcohol due to a liver condition by mixing some into my drinks. He then complained that my ceaseless vomiting made his bathroom smell bad, and only took me to hospital when I started having a seizure. FML
Today, after decades of 24/7 cognitive impairment and being made to feel like a hypochondriac by many doctors over the years, I learned I have a severe physical illness. I kept researching and discovered my own illness, found out which test to ask for, and finally showed doctors proof. FML
Today, I threw up due to food poisoning. Despite my fever and pain, my wife is completely convinced it was from secretly drinking, and I am now "PERMANENTLY FORBIDDEN" from drinking anything alcoholic. FML
Today, I went to see a doctor due to some gastric distress I have. I came out with directions to buy a blood pressure monitor, I'm prohibited from doing sports, and have a possible diagnosis of arterial hypertension which I am way too young to have. FML
Today, I finally went to the doctor for a condition I've had all my life. Turns out it was easily cured with a simple pill. I peed in my pants everyday for 27 years for nothing. FML
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Top comments
BlondePsycho 43
You can get liver problems if you mess around with pills. Same thing happened to my grandpa. Only one in my family who didn't drink a day in his life, but his doctors over-medicated him for a heart condition and he died from liver failure. I'd check any drugs you've been taking.
fatfaceunited 0
well now is the time to start!!!
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Comments (155)
thisishilarious 0
pussy, live a little
pat2rome 0
#25, no they don't, not all the time.
Kitty34_fml 0
"Generally found in alcoholics" - that means not always. This is an FML because you were diagnosed with a liver problem, but the fact that alcoholics often have the same condition has nothing to do with anything..
ffpoisongirl 0
Look on the bright side - if you HAD drank, it probably would have worsened it.
gymnosperm 0
It's called Cirrhosis. Stop eating fatty foods and you'll lose the scar tissue. Cirrhosis is generally attributed to alcoholics. However, high fat diets which causes obesity is now a leading trend in the disease. Have fun losing weight!
thinmint 0
you'll lose the scar tissue? no...a fatty liver does not contain scar tissue...it is just that, fat, hence fatty liver
legit_tofit 0
ahem. GENERALLY found in alcoholics... not ALWAYS.
kdubyou 0
i said FYL cause you've never drank a day in your life! And #37 i think they got the point about "generally" that's why they added the "i've never drank a day in my life." Thats why its a "FML" duh.
xo0bella1178 0
fyl that sucks. same thing happened to my dad, almost died of liver failure & he never drank a day which baffled everyone. good luck, hope you stay healthy!
pinkducttape 0
#38 legit_tofit and #35 kitty34 i think thats the f-ed up part - the op tried to do the healthy thing by not drinking and still got the diagnosis - a diagnosis mainly caused by drinking - so everyone will assume theyre an alcoholic - like all the other comments on this where people assume the op is a druggie or fat. op i wish you the best in treatments. by not drinking you should have a higher chance of a healthy immune system.
icanhazstapler 0
It's never too late to start!