Today, I got fired. My coworker decided to imitate my voice, stand outside of my boss's office door, and say insulting things about his daughter. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I told my supervisor how awful my coworker was at her job. I then got fired. FML
Today, I got fired from work. Why? I finally took a stand for myself and confronted my coworker of writing things up in my name for herself, and it getting deducted from my check. So she went to the manager and accused me of sexual harassment. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML
Today, my boss fired me because of the way I laugh. Apparently it reminds him too much of his ex-wife's laugh. I'm a guy. FML
Today, my boss fired me because I corrected him after he misspoke during a meeting. FML
Today, my girlfriend came to my workplace to tell me she was breaking up with me. My boss, who was passing by, fired me for "chatting with friends" during work hours. FML
Today, I assisted a customer at work. She was asking me all sorts of stupid questions and acting like an entitled, spoiled brat. When she left, since I had a mask on, I meant to mouth, "Stupid bitch" but I blurted it out loud. Everyone heard. I was fired. FML
Today, I was talking to this girl I really like at my work. Everything was going fine until our boss called me into his office. Apparently I was being a little too flirty with his daughter. FML
Today, I overheard my boss talking about me on the phone. Turns out he was drunk off his ass when he gave the go-ahead to hire me, and he's now searching for any excuse to legally fire me. FML
Today, my boss finally pronounced my name correctly. My name was then followed by the words, "You're fired." FML
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Top comments
zinoxity 23
Damn. That takes skill! But I doubt he's good enough to actually make it sound exactly like you.
KeyboardWarrior 10
Tell him it wasn't you, then beat your co-worker to a pulp. If you are willing to go that far, you probably aren't lying.
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Comments (96)
Dirgel 4
Tell your coworker you may go look for a job while they're at the same job tommorow, or you may go visit they're spouse.
murdersquirrel 15
What does any of that mean?
The_Troller 14
I don't even...
Death_From_Above 0
THEIR spouse... Dipshit
bobbycorwen 5
This don't not make perfect cents. Duh.
VoteForTaco 8
35- Of course it doesn't make money...
thatKidzmOm 10
I believe 35 did that on purpose. Or I may be wrong. Who knows these days.
AceArctic 4
Their spouse would be OP's mom or stepmom...
AceArctic 4
Their spouse would be OP's mom or stepmom...
ICaughtFire 4
I wonder if what #1 meant was to tell OP that he should go see his coworkers spouse while said coworker is at work the next day. Kind of like "I may go look for a job today, while you're at work, or I may go see your wife/husband. Who knows?"
Akharr01 5
Uh, uhm.... How do you reply to something that makes no sense?!
jazbeth94 0
You dont
TomHarrow 5
How about i go visit your spouse? Dumbass.
k_ninjaa 9
(74) thanks for the clarification.
zinoxity 23
Damn. That takes skill! But I doubt he's good enough to actually make it sound exactly like you.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Nevertheless, OP's boss is clearly a dumbf*ck...
TheMaster15 10
^BOB SAGGET!!
Jakesterk96 8
Is your coworker Gabriel Iglesias?
KeyboardWarrior 10
Tell him it wasn't you, then beat your co-worker to a pulp. If you are willing to go that far, you probably aren't lying.
ChucktheNorris 0
Challenge accepted.
Jakesterk96 8
So as soon as your boss heard those insults, he just assumed it was you without checking?
jacob4592 0
Barny!!!!!!
YayFlameWarz 9
Either you have a real easy voice to imitate or he's a vantriliquist.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
The FML never specified the coworker's gender, so it's most likely a woman. Although, it's funnier to pretend it wasn't.
KeyboardWarrior 10
How is it most likely a woman if there is no gender to specify?
Laurenlou 24
51- OP's name says "JennJenn." I'm guessing that OP is female. It would have been easier for another female to imitate her voice, verses a male imitating her voice.
KeyboardWarrior 10
Right, I didn't look at OP's name, my apologies.
kareltje 17
Gotta remember that world for scrabble. That'll give me 2x triple word value, it's got a Q and a whole lot of other funky stuff.
jerjy1 5
like a boss
wironandine 8
That's original,
Ashystar 1
WTF?? ^^^
Mister_Triangle 21
I'm with 55; people say that too much and it's getting very annoying. That phrase and "seems legit" are quickly approaching "arrow in the knee" levels of intolerability
Enslaved 38
Thanks to your co-workers, you can kiss your letter of reference goodbye.
Buttsexpirate 9
Argh! Give me his name. I be in the need for fresh meat. Also kick him in the dick and tell your boss OP. hopefully you'll get your job back.
deviable 9
You should talk like a pirate more often.
KiddNYC1O 22
Agreed. I always read Butt's comments with the voice of the pirate from Spongebob. Lol.
desireev 18
Although that was very rude of your coworker, I wouldn't think your boss would be able to fire you for that. First reason being that it wasn't you who was saying those things. Second reason being that you're supposed to keep all personal matters and feelings outside of the workplace. So him getting mad about the things said about his daughter would be getting mad over a personal matter. I believe that would be wrongful termination. You should check in to that, OP.
RedPillSucks 33
Different states in the US have different laws about wrongful termination. Some states allow a worker to be fired without cause, as long as the cause is not related to gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion.
JoGeLu 2
No offense, but quit replying you stubborn "know it all". No one cares you "know" everything there is to know.
THE_A_TEEN 28
**** off #29, you ignoramous.
desireev 18
Is he talking to me? I don't act like I know it all. That's why I only comment on maybe 2 FMLs a day. I only comment on ones that I, for sure, know about. I really hope he's not talking to me. :(
GoW_Chick 15
32- "This is not the thread you are looking for" There is no 29 here...
silentbutfunny 0
37 it must be removed, i cant find it anywhere
PaulB123 11
33 I see what you're saying, but it obviously doesn't apply to all situations. Imagine if the worker went up to the boss and called his daughter ugly and fat. As well as many other vulgar names. You don't think he could fire him/her for that?
desireev 18
37 and 42- There was a guy on here before and he called someone a stuck up, know-it-all and said some really mean things. But nobody knew who he was talking to.. I guess the mods didn't find the comment too appealing either..
desireev 18
49- No. I don't believe he should be able to fire someone for that. But I am also a firm believer in keeping personal life and matters out of the workplace. To each their own, I guess..
TheDrifter 24
The cause of termination would likely be "creating a hostile work environment" certainly grounds for dismissal most places.
xbella 8
lol now that's a good coworker, willing to get fired with you
Torva_fml 16
Nope.
ThatLoneIyGuy 8
Try again
GoW_Chick 15
Hey since you're already fired, I say go for broke, and tackle his ass to the ground, show him who's boss, even if it's only for a spilt second.
murdersquirrel 15
That could result in charges that make it difficult to find new employment...
GoW_Chick 15
It would be worth it.
apbunome1 0
Not if can't ever get another well paying job