Today, I got an e-mail from my University saying I may have violated the Student Code of Conduct for being drunk in public at a football game, and now I have to go in to defend myself against charges. My lungs filled with fluid at the game, causing me to throw up. I had to be taken away in an ambulance. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the game with my boss and some people he does business with on his tab. I got so drunk that I blacked out, threw up all over the table, and passed out in the bathroom. I woke up alone with my body reeking of vomit, and no phone. FML
Today, my swim coach had me swim a 400 meter freestyle. Feeling a little sick near the end, I lifted my head to breathe, then burped, and threw up violently all in the pool. All my team mates screamed horrified running out of the pool, and now they have to drain it. I was told not to come back. FML
Today, I went to my first university party already a little drunk. I perched on the end of a table to cool off from the dancing and the whole table tipped over and dumped me onto the floor. I was promptly laughed out of the room. FML
Today, days before my graduation, I got sick with a virus, so I had constant vomit and incontinence. To receive my diploma, I had to wear a diaper and spend the whole graduation drinking electrolytes. FML
Today, without any warning from my body whatsoever, I had to go to the bathroom at work to puke. I was then fired for being ‘drunk’ at work. I wasn’t drunk, just sick. FML
Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML
Today, I was supposed to give a presentation to the incoming freshman about the dangers of drinking in college. My co-presenter showed up drunk. FML
Today, I woke up feeling ill. My mom sent me to school anyway, and grounded me for "lying" about being sick. As soon as I got to school, I began vomiting blood. FML
Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML
Today, I was walking to school and decided to be a good citizen by picking up a beer can on the sidewalk. I then walked on to my school's campus where I then got suspended by my dean for "trying to rebel", grounded by my parents for getting suspended, and an MIP from the school's police guard. FML
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Top comments
moleSG 6
So go defend yourself and tell them what happened. If this is true, it won't be a problem. No problem, really. Just a bit of an unfortunate mix-up.
GIRAFFES 0
Doctor's note. Done.
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Comments (37)
schwinn11 0
Are you for real, "your lungs filled up with fluid", Ive used some pretty far out excuses while I was drunk, but I gotta hand it to you, that's the wildest excuse for being drunk I've ever heard. Try to stay sober long enough to to get back into to school, and if your ever trip'n on acid just tell them your blood sugar's to high! Hahahahahaha, fluid in the lungs!!!!!
LilaBear 2
if it was just an excuse for the university, she wouldn't have bothered posting it on FML, would she??
xx_irish_rose_xx 0
That's sucky, but all you have to do is show the hospital records at the hearing to prove you weren't drunk, you were sick.
Carpebios 0
only in America
flyingburger 0
Take your Doctor's note to the University Ombudsman or your variant of. Give them a written request demanding a hearing with the Dean of Student Life or whoever gave you the first letter due to harassment and discrimination about a medical condition. They'll back off so fast you wouldn't believe.
Mewtwo_fml 1
I would say that not only should this be an open-and-shut case for you, but full tuition reimbursement plus a free ride for the rest of your college days would be in order!
Simply_J 0
Shouldn't have drank that much!
LilaBear 2
your lungs don't fill with fluid from drinking, idiot.
yazdmich 1
it might have gone down the wrong way?
spank_u_veryhard 0
who the hell doesn't drink during a college football game?? where do you go to school, BYU?
yuriq 2
Seriously. Lungs filled with fluid? That sounds like some serious shit that will kill you next week.
postaltubealex 0
LOL american colleges are strict as. Here, the university supplies the kegs!
bytbox 0
Take a doctor's note saying you weren't drunk to prove it - but do so while drunk.