Today, I found out I have an abscess in my bellybutton which causes me extreme pain and discomfort when I sit down. I am a receptionist. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I noticed a disgusting, cheesy smell and spent all day wondering what it was. I later found out that it wasn't coming from my feet, but from my belly button. My surgery wound got infected. I'm a germaphobe. FML
Today, I found out that the reason I have unbearable pain in my stomach when I sit down is because I have two horrifyingly large boils on my waist. My mother nearly fainted when I showed them to her. FML
Today, I have a painful abscess with a bacterial infection near my bum that makes sitting or walking difficult, and a fever too due to it. The doctor gave me sick note and told me to rest, but my husband shouted at me for taking sick off when I "only" WFH. He also expects me to do house chores the whole day. FML
Today, I have been home sick and depressed for so long that I just found Oreo crumbs in my belly button. FML
Today, I'm recovering from abdominal surgery. In addition to pain, I'm having trouble peeing and haven't pooped since Sunday, so my surgeon prescribed a laxative. Turns out I'm allergic to it. Now I'm covered in hives, even in my ears, incisions, and lady parts. I also still haven't pooped. FML
Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML
Today, I went to the ER as I have an ulcer and I was exhibiting signs of a perforation. This is when the gorgeous doctor told me he had to stick his finger up my butt to check for rectal bleeding. FML
Today, after nerve pain and trouble sitting down, I found a lump in my ass crack. My doctor thought might be a tumour or cancer, so I was sent for scans. Apparently my whole life I’ve had an ingrown vestigial tail at the bottom of my spine hidden under the skin. FML
Today, I woke up with a big and very painful pimple on the inside of my butt cheek. Because of my Crohn's disease decided to flare up at the same time, my 3 trips to the bathroom at work were only tolerable because I didn't have to deal with rude customers yelling at me for situations I have no control over. FML
Today, I had the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my lower right abdomen. I was doubled over and vomiting it hurt so bad. After going to the E.R., thinking it was my appendix and getting checked in, I let out the biggest most rancid fart in my life and the pain immediately went away. FML
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Top comments
yesio12 13
You should get that checked out. It's affecting your daily life and causing pain :/
every1luvsboners 11
Go to a car wash, pay the 50 cents to use the vacuum on your belly button and it'll suck that thing right out of there.
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Comments (112)
Enslaved 38
I like it! It reminds me of Sid Vicious but still includes your own style.(: I'm a huge "Sex Pistols" fan!
vettle 6
Easiest jobs ever? Check again
fmlblahblah 3
I had an absses a while ago i couldn't walk. It sucks
blacknail3dfr3ak 3
How do I post a picture lol sorry about the randomness
blacknail3dfr3ak 3
Nevermind!!! Figured it out. Sorry about your thingy btw!
absolutegrrr 7
This isn't Facebook, gtfo.
blacknail3dfr3ak 3
Bite me :)
blacknail3dfr3ak 3
Pshhh. I was a receptionist for three years.. Best. Job. Ever.
jellyD 1
So get it lanced! Instant relief!
GiggityGiggityGo_fml 8
Medical Mary j will sort it out... Might be hard in the reception tho...
perdix 31
It was just so cheap and convenient to get your belly button pierced down at the gas station, wasn't it? Now, that's not looking like such a great idea after all. I don't know what your religion has to do with anything -- I'm not familiar with Receptionism. Is it like Scientology?
Cookie_box 6
Hahaha that's the funniest commend I've ever read :)) Way to go! ^^^
missL1z 5
Your umbilical cord just dropped off or something? How do you get abcess there?
Kiirst_mt1994 26
take time off and get it sorted, but fyl