Today, I brought several bags of soda cans to the store to cash in. I hadn't shaved, and my coat had fur all over from my cat rubbing on it. The lady in front of me turned around, looked at my bags and me and said, "It's a lot of money people throw away, isn't it?" Apparently, I look homeless. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML
Today, I was accosted by an angry homeless man at the recycling center, since I refused to give him my saved up bottles and cans. He insisted that he needed it more and I was "poaching his turf". I needed the recycling to put gas in my car, just to make it to work and hope I could make it back home. FML
Today, I walked two miles to the store, filled my cart with groceries, and got to the cashier… only to find I had forgotten my wallet. I tried to explain but got the nastiest stank-eye from the cashier, the manager, and everyone in line behind me. I walked two miles home, hungry and embarrassed. FML
Today, I went to Walmart to get some acne cream. As I approached the register, I looked in my wallet for the money. The cashier saw that I didn't have enough money, and before I could say anything, he goes, "Just take it, I've never seen anyone who needs it this much." FML
Today, a homeless guy asked me for a cigarette. Knowing that I only had a couple left in my pack, I gave it to him. He opened it, took one out and thanked me profusely. A bit surprised, I went on my way. Oh yeah, that's right, the pack contained the money I'd withdrawn from an ATM. FML
Today, I realized that the homeless people I give change to all dress better than I do, including the one that doesn't believe in pants. FML
Today, I went to the supermarket to buy my weekly groceries and only realized after a long queue at the checkout, then having the cashier scan my entire cart, that I'd forgotten my purse. I had to leave everything behind and walk out empty-handed, while everyone in line behind me gave me dirty looks. FML
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, at work, a homeless woman called me trash, threw her coffee at me, and told me to get a job. I do have a job. It's homeless outreach. FML
Today, at my retail job, a woman came to my till with her purchases. After I scanned all her items, she handed me two small bags. One was filled with nickels and dimes. The other was filled with cents. Her total was $28.53. The coins amounted to $22.30. FML
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Top comments
cessily 8
People need to recycle more
taniamw 9
Always typical for people to judge first
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Comments (90)
DellyCup 1
Just because she said that... Doesn't mean she thinks you look homeless. Obviously YOU think you look homeless. Lolol
ClosetTroll 10
Or she could have implied that people throw away a lot of easy money by not recycling soda cans. If anything you sound like a normal middle aged man.
SexyHindu 2
**** the environment, DON'T RECYCLE
hellaflushfa5 6
Go play in traffic.
pissedoffalot 0
Shouldve said "yeah it's a living"
theevilduchess 12
Take a shower you filthy hippy!
niall92 6
I don't think that's what she meant at all. That's a completely valid statement. Sounds like something my mom would do haha.
KriiFahMoro 9
At least you weren't like the other that other homeless guy cleaning his hobo friend's bloody infected balls...
KriiFahMoro 9
Whoops, looks like I accidentally my sentence.
Zomg_Okay 27
So stop whining to us and go clean yourself up. Simple.
Psycho_Babydoll 26
Sucks when that happens, but you gotta learn to laugh it off. I was at a pub with my uncle once and he was wearing a really shabby coat and was playing a harmonica. Don't ask why, he just thought it was fun. But a woman walking past stopped and gave him her spare change cos he looked like a tramp. :)
titzenpitzer 9
take advantage of it! Get a crappy little bucket and sit down at a mall