Today, at my job at a frozen yogurt shop, an elderly woman gladly announced that I'd be seeing a lot of her due to the vaginal infection that she has. Thank you for that, ma'am. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my grandmother loudly announced that she has a yeast infection. Under her breast. She attempted to show me. FML
Today, while working as a cashier, I was ringing up an elderly woman's massaging shower head, when she said, "If I had a man like you, I wouldn't need this." She then gave me her number. FML
Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML
Today, at work, I cashed out a sweet old lady. As I handed her the bag, she looked at me kindly and said, "Don’t worry sweetie. It'll get better," to which I responded, "What will get better?" She smiled at me and said, "Your face." FML
Today, I made a patient really happy. I work in a long term care facility and was changing a woman's diaper. While cleaning her, I somehow managed to give her an orgasm with a warm wash cloth. FML
Today, at work, an old lady was staring at my crotch a lot. I looked down, thinking maybe I had an open fly. I didn't. FML
Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML
Today, an old woman came into my store for help. Towards the end, she asked me my name. I told her while pointing at my name tag. She then replied, "Oh! I didn't notice since I was staring at your boobs. Much prettier to look at." Sadly, this is the first time I've been hit on in months. FML
Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML
Today, I was finally having a conversation with my granny, who I don't get to see often. First thing she tells me was that she was going to have surgery soon, because her "women's insides" were "dangling out." FML
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Top comments
Catkam623 27
What does frozen yogurt have to do with vaginal infections?
peacheso 31
Apparently, it can be applied topically to treat yeast infections. Sorry guys but he asked.
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Comments (100)
aubama_fml 15
hey don't you know vaginal infection is worth a free cup of frozen yogurt?
RusticChick 27
Apparently a lot of people don't know that eating yogurt helps balance the pH level and reduces risk of infection or an already occurring infection...
8313girl 28
Yes regular yogurt. I don't think she needs to be getting frozen yogurt if she wants an infection to go away
RusticChick 27
I like your guys' cat pictures :p
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Yes it helps but it does not cure it. Besides, they add a lot of sugar in frozen yogurt, it's not very healthy to eat a lot of it. You're better off eating plain organic yogurt (and no, I'm not a hipster).
RusticChick 27
Guess that old lady just doesn't give a damn. Lol. That or she has antibiotics for it, which could be likely.
kpopforeverr 11
No one said you where...and that's not even hipster like
isisorchid 16
It wouldn't be an antibiotic. Antibiotics cause yeast infections. She'd need an antifungal. Yeast is a fungus. Anyway, frozen Greek yoghurt could have live cultures in it, but it is unlikely that a chain shop would have that. Eating regular yoghurt from the market that says "contains live active cultures" would be best. Also, cutting back sugar. If you eat too much sugar it is excreted in your urine, and sugar feeds yeast. It'll make it worse.
dragonkisses28 25
#26 and all you other folks mentioning antibiotics, antibiotics CAUSE yeast infections by killing off all the good bacteria that keeps all the bad junk in check. This in turn allows yeast and other creepy crawlies to grow. Eating yogurt with LIVE cultures helps restore the normal balance. Vaginal yeast is not treated with antibiotics. It's usually treated with creams, and I will spare you the details of how such creams are applied. You're welcome.
Sun_Kissed18 25
@64 we happen to be one of those chains! There's no FDA standard for the amount of cultures the yogurt needs to have, but the brand we use does claim to have a high number of the cultures. We even have that "live and active cultures" sign on our menu; so its not the worst choice she could have made. I just hope I'm not working when she comes in again
91hayek 31
Bartenders get that too with cranberry juice as a mixer.
ihpp 22
you learn something new everyday. at least she is trying to help herself.
DocBastard 40
OP, I have to admit your username gave me palpitations and flashbacks to "Sunkissedluster". This will go right over most everyone's heads, and for that I apologise.
PenguinBitch 44
Doc, that's her sister who posted the fml.
sunkissedluster 20
omg your so mean ): u bastard!
hailey16 9
Old people-no filters
Omniprism 15
Wow. Some people....
gemcguire 13
Dairy is a lie. We don't need dairy, lol.
buckdharma 38
For your sake op, I hope"seeing a lot of her" doesn't take on another meaning.
dimasev 12
Fro yo has mystical qualities