Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after spotting my ex-boyfriend's truck in a desolate parking lot, I decided to "decorate" the muddy side of it with a rather large male appendage. After checking around me to make sure there were no witnesses, I got to work. I probably should have made sure he wasn't sitting in the truck. FML
Today, after leaving a store I got stuck at a red light. A car pulled up next to me and there was a half retarded man jerking his junk at me. Nasty image burned into my corneas forever. FML
Today, I was at work, a grocery store, and my manager came up to me while I was on my lunch break. He told me that a customer said someone in the parking lot had been loitering around the cars. I went outside to investigate and saw a drunk man pooping on the front of a car. That car was mine. FML
Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML
Today, in my tidy, small-town neighborhood, I parked my car 50 metres further back from my usual spot just across from our house on a half-empty public street, because it was taken. Apparently, someone didn't appreciate this. So much so, they put a used condom under my windshield wiper. FML
Today, I went to the mall with a couple of friends. While walking through the parking lot, we saw a very dirty car. You couldn't even see the inside of the car through the windows. I thought it would be funny to trace on the window, "Wash Me." After doing so, the driver got out of the car. FML
Today, I fainted. Instead of stopping to help, some guy stopped to draw a penis on my forehead. The EMT laughed. FML
Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML
Today, after getting off work from a horrible 16 hour shift, I went out to my truck. My windows were completely covered in window chalk, to the point that I couldn't leave. I had to spend the next hour and a half washing it all off while my manager laughed about it. FML
Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML
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Top comments
misspeg 0
people can be so immature sometimes! FYL
zombienightmare 0
your neighbor must think your a dick
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Comments (72)
dogsickftl 0
Always knew you'd be riding a dick sometime.
wet11 2
whoo whoo! I moderated this! FYL anyways
HearMeOut 0
At least you were able to scrub it off.
darkmis1 18
Maybe you should start keeping your car in the garage.
TryToBeKind 0
way to assume they have a garage. My old apartment complex sure didn't and the only reason the house I'm renting does is because I got lucky. One side is mine, the other is for the people who live in the upstairs of the house. Thank goodness they are not dicks who take up both sides of the garage. Anyway, ug. My first thought was that it was someone OP knew and that he/she is/was punishing OP for something. Many years ago, a friend got dumped by a boyfriend of enarly a year with no explanation other than "I don't want a girlfriend, I know myself well enough to know that, I've been really thinking this through for a long time, this really breaks my heart to do this to you because I'e been trying and trying to work it out blah, blah, blah" Basically, HE wanted to be the one to end the relationship and he didn't want to explain himself because he didn't want to hear it that he was wrong. And he expected HER to stay out of HIS life (as in, not come into where he worked, not hang out with his roommates who were her friends too) and on and. We made sure that wouldn't fly (sure enough, he IMMEDIATELY began flirting with, making out with pretty much everything (Mr "I don't want a girlfriend") so we made sure his precious white European car had some pretty serious graffiti on it. He got it cleared off and we kept putting it back on to make a point. we also made sure to track down as many as possible of those girls and elt them know what he was like. Karma is sooooooooooooo sweet
x0_fml 0
?? Ramble much? >.>
IIzSuperGirl 0
Yehh seriously, ramble much? It was PROBABLY some 14 year old boys who where bored out their little heads and decided to do something remotely intresting to pass their time with, aka, driving op insane =)
skyttlz 32
Cool story bro.
somename1223132 5
Ha ha that suckes
SweetieLish 0
Wow, they must have gotten to your car after they got mine...I went out last week and I had a huge penis drawn on my windshield in that car chalk stuff....they must have drawn it after they kicked a dent in my passenger side door.
Bright_Lights 14
Ah well, thats Manchester life for you ;)
blastvortex 4
Well, somebody's being a ********...
Mx_Rider 6
big deal. oh no how will i ever move on with my life, theres a penis on the side of my soccer mom van noooo same shit diff day wash it off relax, maybe really ride a dick...or 2 :D
supercu96 0
LOL