Today, after having a few beers at a bar, I gave my ticket to the valet to get my car. I tipped the man $2 and he gave me a huge smile and thanked me a lot as I left. I thought the guy was just really appreciative for those $2 until I got home and saw one of the $100 bills in my wallet was gone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to be a generous guy and slip a dollar from my pocket to a beggar. Turns out I'd slipped my hard-earned $100 bill instead. FML
Today, after finding $50 on the sidewalk this morning and feeling like the luckiest person alive, I got a parking ticket for $60. FML
Today, a customer handed me a 100 dollar bill. He then told me that it was my tip for doing a good job. He snatched it away just as I touched it, laughed, and said, "Just kidding." He then took his money and left the store. FML
Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some guy picking up $300. FML
Today, I was complimented by my guests about the great of service I was giving them. They then left me a $2 tip on a $50 tab. FML
Today, I got a parking ticket. I put the ticket in my bag and accidentally left the bag in my friends car. When I returned, the car window was smashed, my bag was gone. I had to call the police department and ask them to send me a new ticket, on top of the $1000 or so I'd already lost. FML
Today, I was working as a Valet driver. After getting no customers for 5 hours in the pouring rain, a woman driving by stops and asks me for directions. Before leaving, she said, "I should probably tip you for that, since that's probably the only money you'd get all night." She didn't. FML
Today, I went to have a drink with my friend. On the way I withdrew 20 bucks and when I arrived at the bar I realised I had taken my credit card but not the banknote. FML
Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML
Today, I was waitering at the restaurant that I work at when I collected a credit card bill that was worth $120 and a big zero on the tip line. Angered, I turned to a co-worker and said "I knew this asshole wasn't going to tip me." The guy was standing right behind me with $30 in his hand. FML
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Top comments
freernnur5 0
YDI for trying to drink and drive
lifeislife_fml 0
You sure made his day!
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Comments (166)
echarperouge 0
If you walk around with hundreds in your wallet, I'm betting he needed the money more than you do.
Lehk 9
YDI for driving drunk, jackass.
ILoveJace01 0
That's why you don't carry big bills in your wallet. Leave it on your card.
somebodyshy 0
Too drunk to notice you're giving a $101 tip is too drunk to drive. If an alcoholic beverage passes your lips, do NOT get behind the wheel.
anniebananie 3
" If an alcoholic beverage passes your lips, do NOT get behind the wheel." Yeah, that's not totally extreme or anything.
YerPal 0
A few beers is enough to impair your driving. DON'T DO IT AGAIN! I'd say YDI but the truth is you deserve worse than that for the lives you endangered.
Jotham 0
Wow if I'm him I'll treat you to a few more beers lol. You sure made his day
xxXChiiXxx 2
Well, you probably brightened his day! :D
BriGuy116 0
he never said he was drunk! a few beers doesn't make you drunk. he probably saw the 1 on the 100 and thought it was two singles.
kyle4321 0
oh so THAT'S why I got such a big tip last night! Yay for drunks :D
lyssalicious 0
ah, that's gotta suck!