Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box, "Face this side towards crowd for the best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on its side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML
Today, my friends and I were hanging out when we thought it would be cool to set off a few fireworks. Nothing burns quite like the hair on the left side of your head. FML
Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML
Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML
Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML
Today, I was at my friend's house and accidentally blew out a candle that was supposed to be lit for seven days straight. It was in honor of her grandmother who had recently died. FML
Today, I lit a cigarette in the opposite direction of the wind. My hair blew into it, and caught on fire. FML
Today, I surprised my friend at their birthday party with a confetti cannon. I pulled the string, expecting colorful joy. Instead, it misfired, launched backwards and smacked me in the forehead. The confetti came out five seconds later, directly onto my dazed head. FML
Today, in honor of America's birthday, my 50-year-old father decided to light off homemade bombs without telling anyone. The screams of me and my family members were louder than the bombs. FML
Today, an idiot decided it would be fun to light up a firecracker in front of our house. It ended with firetrucks, a black yard, and yet somehow the weeds survived. FML
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Top comments
shaPOW 0
the way this is written is misleading, like you read that you were supposed to turn that side toward the audience but you turned it on its side anyway. i hope no one got hurt.
NGM_KID 0
Don't lie, we all know you secretly plotted this so you could kill them.....too bad your plan backfired :P
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Comments (118)
Brittani090270 1
I actually laughed outloud. Haha good job.
jeanniner 0
holy ****. not funny at all. Fireworks are DANGEROUS. I know someone that lost a hand from fireworks. Not something to dick around with.
Hullaballoo 0
That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time
sockergurl916 0
i wish i could shoot fireworks at my family...
nofyourlife 0
this is a prime example of why operating fireworks without a license is illegal in many states. i'm sure there are a lot of smart people who could light them safely but they are outweighed by people who do stuff like this...
ilackeffort 0
LMMFAO!!! Wow, you're dumb and shouldn't be allowed to play with fireworks...ever! Hell, I can't follow instructions too well either, so when something seems like it can't be that safe, I let someone else do it, duh.
BulldogQB4 0
You're an idiot. Probably why fireworks are illegal. "Face towards crowd" "DURRRR THIS MUST MEAN POINT IT AT THEM"
blalien 0
Agree with #45. How could you not tell that the tubes were pointed at the audience? You should be in prison right now.
btz520 0
and this is exactly why fireworks are illegal in so many places because of people like you
xxissuesxx 0
POWNED