Stevie
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
Canada
They're after us!
Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML
Top comments
saIty 17
Did you also know that your toys come alive when you're not inside the house?
the_easter_bunny 1
You think she's crazy now... But just wait. You'll see.
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Comments (153)
tiptoppc 21
Tell her pink flamingos are a secret message that gays are advertising their sex orgies and occult dungeons. Being chaotic evil, I’m likely to add more ridiculous theories to these idiots by suggesting almost plausible bullshit to occupy their time going down more rabbit holes. Makes my time in public less cluttered with morons when they spend their time trying to connect dinosaurs being wiped out with the sudden proliferation of the catholic church and apples becoming an edible fruit that tastes great! Or bananas lost their original flavour as it was too addictive for monkeys and humans competing to harvest them and too much money was spent on bullets and trying to get rid of the piles of monkey corpses that they racked up during harvest. It’s why you can’t ask hawaiians if they fought off monkeys lately.
tiptoppc 21
Tell her pink flamingos are a secret message that gays are advertising their sex orgies and occult dungeons. Being chaotic evil, I’m likely to add more ridiculous theories to these idiots by suggesting almost plausible bullshit to occupy their time going down more rabbit holes. Makes my time in public less cluttered with morons when they spend their time trying to connect dinosaurs being wiped out with the sudden proliferation of the catholic church and apples becoming an edible fruit that tastes great! Or bananas lost their original flavour as it was too addictive for monkeys and humans competing to harvest them and too much money was spent on bullets and trying to get rid of the piles of monkey corpses that they racked up during harvest. It’s why you can’t ask hawaiians if they fought off monkeys lately.