Today, my mother "checked in" to rehab on Facebook. The same rehab that told her to hand over her smartphone. The dumbass was smart enough to steal my phone and dumb enough to get it confiscated. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found the iPod touch that my mother claimed was stolen at the mall a few years ago, lying on her bed, still logged in to her Facebook. Thanks, mom. FML
Today, my alcoholic mother decided to finally check herself into rehab. She did it while drunk, and flirted with the front attendant. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me on Facebook to stop calling/texting her because she lost her phone. Right under her post was "sent from Facebook for iPhone." FML
Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
Today, my mother hacked my Facebook and broke up with my boyfriend and pretended to be me. She told him if he ever talks to me again, she'll call the cops. FML
Today, my mom added me on Facebook. She wrote on my wall, for the whole world to see, "Why are you swearing on the internet?! You're grounded". FML
Today, I found out that my mom uses my Facebook account more than I do. FML
Today, while on vacation with my family, my mother told me to put my phone in her purse, so it wouldn't get stolen. Someone stole her purse. FML
Today, my parents gave me an iPhone. They then checked my grades online, and promptly took it away. FML
Today, I found out that my mom has linked my iPhone with her iPad and has been secretly reading my texts. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
They tried to confiscate my phone and I said "No, no, no."
U_GotitDude 18
Can't you go get it back? FYL OP
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Comments (78)
mfischer 17
Am I the only one wondering why OP's mom would want to check in to rehab on Facebook in the first place?
J1ee08 5
I find it hilarious how you referred to your mom as "the dumbass". HAHAHA.
soph_volleyball 11
What??
ketchuplover 7
Wow. You're an ass for calling your own mother a "dumbass."
BigSexy123 11
Oh, shut up. Parents aren't perfect. They don't automatically have your respect; they have to earn it like everyone else. My dad is a total prick.
stoptrying 9
Because all parents are perfect and children are never allowed to call them dumbasses even when they behave like dumbasses, right, #72?
fmlseriously132 4
You win some, lose some. At least she's in rehab
clokwrkpig 6
You should actually be able to get it back from them, if you can prove ownership. They would actually be liable in detinue (or conversion, seeing as that tort has all but replaced it) if they refused to return it to the true owner.
kongera 1
You should never call your mom a dumbass one she gave birth to you which puts her through a ton of pain and she cares for you and has taken care of you your entire life.
Fou_Lou 20
But that was her decision to get a child and that kind of responsibility. You cant blame that on the child.