Today, I visited my grandma. She offered me some chips in a Ziploc bag. I thought they were sour cream and onion chips from the look of them. They tasted funny, but I didn't want to be rude and I kept eating. I looked closer after a while and noticed that what I thought were chives was actually mold. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came home tired and hungry from work. I put my feet up and sat down with a big bowl of chips and salsa. I thought I must've been really hungry because my regular no-name salsa tasted way better than usual. I looked down to examine the jar. Looks like I like the taste of mold. FML
Today, I was eating nacho chips with my nieces when I started to feel that some were wet. I look at my niece and notice she was sucking on the chips, and putting them back in the bag. FML
Today, I really wanted something to drink. I looked in the fridge, and found some of my grandma's soy milk. I took a swig, and instead of tasting soy, I tasted something rotten. Turns out my grandma knows I drink her soy milk, so she swapped it with expired chicken broth. FML
Today, I was halfway through eating a what I though was a delicious sandwich, when I turned it over and saw nasty green mold on the bread. FML
Today, I was eating at my aunt's place with all my cousins and the salad had little green and alive bugs. I didn't want to cause attention, so I tried to pick some off and just kept eating. FML
Today, I was eating a brownie my grandmother had made, only to discover an inch long piece of what resembled dead skin in the middle of it. This discovery was only made after taking a bite and wondering why the consistency was wrong. FML
Today, I was making one of those microwavable pizza kits. Realizing I had no crushed red pepper to put on it, my mom suggested using a chili pepper she had dried. Thinking it was a great idea, I cracked it open on my pizza and out popped some fuzzy white mold and two maggots. FML
Today, I ate what was supposed to be a delicious mini powdered donut. The first one tasted funny, so I pulled out another one and realized that the powdered sugar was now in fact powdered hairy mold. Then I looked at the package and realized it was over a year and a half old. FML
Today, I was hungry and decided to nibble on some Cheez-Its I had in my room. After I'd enjoyed some of them, I looked into the box to see how many I had left, where I noticed a lot of little black moving dots. Apparently I wasn't the only one enjoying the crackers. FML
Today, I got a package containing a present from my grandma. It was a pack of cookies someone gave her for her birthday, and which no one in the family wanted to take home when she offered, because we all found the cookies disgusting. FML
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Top comments
Dogmaw 0
They say that Buddha died from eating spoiled meat the home of some Chinese peasants. He felt it would be rude and disrespectful not to eat what they had been kind enough to offer from their limited supplies. If they make a statue of you, I am SO gonna rub your belly.
meeeep 0
your grandma hates you..
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Comments (87)
plexico 4
I hope you are not sandwich-dipped-in-dog-urine guy, because you would be having a really bad day. If not, maybe you two ought to get together for lunch. Surely, there is a turf out there waiting for two assholes to accidentally eaten.
RandomFool 5
Win lol.
Dogmaw 0
They say that Buddha died from eating spoiled meat the home of some Chinese peasants. He felt it would be rude and disrespectful not to eat what they had been kind enough to offer from their limited supplies. If they make a statue of you, I am SO gonna rub your belly.
Link5794 18
WTF o.O
Suckstbeyou 0
MAN that no good my grandma was like Martha Stewart she never would have done something like that. maybe she was trying to get rid of you? for good!
IrishDevil666 0
wow man that sucks
lil_miz_liz09 0
HAHA
CallMeHush 1
LOL, never trust anything out of the purse of an old lady.
anniesaysbueno 0
yuck. oldies sure are characters aren't they? just don't let her feed you anything else.
stinkybutt 0
awww sick. jo ass is gonna get diarrhea!
ImAKlutz15 0
ew haha thats gross yesterday my grandma made me eat some pancakes that tasted like rubber and waffle that tasted like fish...
vampirette_6 0
Dude, those chips are probably as old as your grandma...