Today, I hired an exterminator to get the roaches out of the house I'm renting. I came back from work and went to my bathroom, noticing that he used the plunger to unclog the toilet after he took a dump. After $150, there was shit all over my floor and plunger, and roaches still in my kitchen. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, an exterminator sprayed for cockroaches in my dorm room. After classes I got back to find three large cockroaches on top of my bed. Now that the exterminator has sprayed everything, all the cockroaches are coming out. FML
Today, after living in my new apartment for barely three weeks, I found mice living under my dishwasher. When I brought it up to the managers, they said I'd have to pay for an exterminator myself since they weren't there when they cleaned. FML
Today, after months of my girlfriend crying about cockroaches, I finally called and paid for an exterminator. Now she's furious at me for "making decisions for her" and she keeps pointing out that, since she owns the house, what I did was technically illegal. FML
Today, I finally broke down and paid someone to clean my condo. Sometime after she finished, my cat threw up. Then my roomba went off, smearing regurgitated mackerel all over the freshly washed floors. There goes $150. FML
Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML
Today, after my landlord has refused to fix the bathroom plumbing problem in my apartment for several days, I had to buy cat litter for myself. FML
Today, I finally got some sleep after an exterminator came yesterday and took care of our roach problem. I woke up and kissed my boyfriend good morning. Frowning, he told me I had something stuck on the corner of my mouth. It was a roach leg. Where is the rest of the roach? FML
Today, after three visits from exterminators and another from a steam cleaner, I still have bedbugs. FML
Today, I found out why I've had cockroaches in my bathroom - my landlord didn't bother to finish the wall behind my bathroom sink. There are literally holes that go straight from my bathroom to the garage downstairs. FML
Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML
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Top comments
BrannFYR 0
LAME!!! Is there any legal action you can take against them? xD
ohhboyy 0
roaches + shit = even nastier than ******* roaches..
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Comments (83)
poolshark 0
Biohazard! Screw the exterminators... this calls for a HazMat team... or arson.
eskimopanda 0
why would you leave the house when you knew a stranger would be coming in your home? YDI.
totalnutjob 0
Send him a bill for the clean up & put a stop payment on the cheque for failure to perform.
mike_i_am 0
He must of been a giant cockroach DISGUISED as a human posing as an exterminator!!!!!
what_the_fail 0
Yes! ^
snake_Girl85 0
What is with all the roach FML's lately?
treli1593 0
sue they asses
Fluhz 6
I'm sorry I meant to thumb up this!
jillian_xx 0
you should have been there while they were there. i wouldn't let a stranger in my home if i wasn't there. YDI.
Limberger 1
Wow #14, you are really clever... NOT. Fail.
bigbuttsowhat 0
yumy
MURPHYCHACHO 5
Why am I reminded of this comic? http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2005/01/19/ That sucks. I would definitely refuse to pay him. Take him to small claims court to get your money back.