Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Today, I went to a park and sat down next to this older lady. Some kids started fighting and screaming at each other, so I leaned next to her and said, "Man, am I glad those aren't MY kids." She turned to me and said, "Yeah, they're mine." FML
Today, I took my kids to the park. I saw my daughter playing with a kid who looked familiar. Turns out he was my ex’s son, whom I haven’t seen in years. I thought it was cute they played so well together, until my ex’s new girlfriend came over, screaming that I was trying to use my kid to get to her man. FML
Today, at the park, I saw my toddler fall. I rushed over, picked him up, and said, “It’s OK, Mum’s here.” He looked confused. So did his real mum. I had mistakenly grabbed a random child instead of my own in front of everyone. They weren't even wearing similar clothes. FML
Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML
Today, while at the park, my 3 year-old ran up to a lady, grabbed her chest and loudly asked, "Are these your breasts? Are they private on you too?" FML
Today, I was at our local park and saw what I thought was my sister holding her baby. I walked up behind her, kissed her on the head, and said, “You’re such a good mum.” It was very much not my sister. It was a very confused and now probably traumatised stranger. FML
Today, at the park, a woman asked if I could watch her toddler for a second while she ran to the bathroom. Before I could answer, she ran off. Ten minutes later, a police officer approached me because someone reported a "man lurking with a child." I’m a woman. And not the babysitter. FML
Today, at the mall, I ran into a lost, crying little girl. It was my best friend's daughter. She recognized and clung on to me. As I called her dad, some nosy lady snatched her from me and caused a scene, screaming, "KIDNAPPER!" As I got apprehended, her claim was she heard me say, "If you still want to see her…" FML
Today, I was at the park with my autistic son when I noticed a teenage girl imitating him by flapping her hands and walking on her toes. Fed up with children mocking my son, I went over and sternly lectured the girl's mother. Turns out, her daughter is autistic too and will be in my son's class. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ddeathbombb 5
Tell her "well it's my child now"
bwzwally8 15
Be a real woman and face the problem.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (78)
ilovecandie 0
You need to become a stronger disciplinary. I really hope that you're not the kind of mom that thinks that your child can do whatever they want, because they can't.
TcheQ 12
Congratulations, you are what's wrong with Australia. Get out of my country.
Mookiisfabulous 15
Yeah because hitting kids to teach them not to hit is to way to go... Thumbs up for you sir!!
eirameelhsa 6
Parent of the year right there.
howbout_thisone 13
Should've just owned up to it and taken care of the situation.
vorspiel 17
YDI so much. Take responsibility for your kid's poor behaviour, or risk making a twat of yourself like you did here.
SuperDanielNL 23
If you are mature enough for kids you are also mature enough to take responsability for them, for ****'s sake it's a kid not a hamster
SiriusBlack97 17
Suck it up. Some kids are inevitably going to be dicks and jerks. Better to face it now an not when he's 29 with excessively spiky hair and no job and living with YOU
viper_dlh04 1
And this is one of many reasons why bullying is such an issue....panzy parents.
sgtcxelite 11
That's when you say something like "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought that was one of the kids I was babysitting"