Today, I got into my car to remember that I left dead fish and waxworms in my car from fishing at the lake yesterday. We unloaded everything but those two stinky things. It was 90 degrees today too. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up late to an urgent voicemail from my dad telling me he left me a present in my car. Excited, I went to investigate. I then saw that his "surprise" was fresh fish he had caught. I hate fish, and now my car stinks. FML
Today, I cleaned out my filthy car. I found an odd, unlabeled tin under the seat, and opened it out of curiosity. It sprayed stinking juice everywhere and filled the house with a horrifying smell. It was Surströmming, half rotten fish, that someone must have stuck in as a prank. FML
Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for the chicken I bought four days ago. I finally found it - not in the refrigerator, not in the freezer, but in the trunk of my car, which now smells like a dead animal. FML
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
Today, it was a little colder than it should be for this time of year, and as a result I was using the heater in my car. Apparently within the last four months, a mouse managed to make his way into my heater vent and die. I can not get the smell of death out of my car. FML
Today, it was the hottest day of the year so I opened my sun roof. The hottest day of the year was followed by the biggest storm of the year. I forgot to close my sun roof and my car is now flooded. FML
Today, I saw maggots dropping from beneath my car. I looked under, to see a rotting paw dangling from my engine. That would explain the smell. FML
Today, I discovered I'd left my coffee on top of my car when it fell through the sun roof whilst I was driving, showering me. FML
Today, I found out why you never leave wet leather shoes in a van when it's over 90 degrees. FML
Today, I was doing laundry and realized that my father had left dirty underwear soaking in a bucket outside for the last two weeks. I informed him that they needed to be thrown out, and they smelled like sewage. It's been over 95 degrees outside lately here. He then yelled and sweared at me. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Oscar Wilde said that fish and houseguests both begin to stink after 3 days, so you should be OK for two more days. He never said anything about waxworms, though, so they may be a problem.
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Comments (1)
RichardPencil 32
Oscar Wilde said that fish and houseguests both begin to stink after 3 days, so you should be OK for two more days. He never said anything about waxworms, though, so they may be a problem.