Today, on my lunch break, I ran to the gas station, and threw some trash away on my way in. On my way out, I realized my keys were missing. Thinking I threw them away, and fearing that I'd be late returning to work, I tore through the disgusting trash only to find my keys on the seat of my car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my keys disappeared out of my car door during the 50 foot walk to the trash can. When I finally went to security after trying to find them, they said someone drove off with my car right as I walked in the door. FML
Today, I went through my purse to see where my keys were. I found my house keys, but not my car keys, so I freaked out. When I remembered that I was driving, I felt stupid. FML
Today, after being without my car keys for two days, I finally got a locksmith to unlock my car on the off chance I'd left my keys in there. $170 later, the car was open, but I didn't find my keys. Frustrated, I threw the paperwork in the garbage... where I spotted my keys. FML
Today, I lost my keys while at the supermarket. I franticly back-tracked through the store, asking everyone I saw along the way. They eventually showed up, right where I left them... in my unattended car, the engine still running. There was an announcement made over the PA system. FML
Today, I was at the gym. At the end of my workout, I realised I lost the bundle of keys I had in my pocket that contained the key to my locker with all my stuff. I panic and start looking for them. After an hour of desperate searching, I find them thrown in the bottom of the public toilet. Thanks. FML
Today, I was running late for an important job interview because I couldn't find my keys. I place the keys on my kitchen counter every day to prevent exactly this type of situation. After few minutes and missing my interview, I finally found my keys, in my hand. FML
Today, I spent five minutes sitting in my car, panicking and tearing my purse apart because I couldn't find my keys. I then found them. They were in the ignition, and the car was running. FML
Today, I was looking for my condo keys, thinking I had left them in my mailbox on the first floor the night before. Leaving to check, I realized I'd forgot to take them out of my door when I had come in, leaving them in the keyhole. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the sewer. The spare ones are inside my locked car. FML
Today, I spent an hour frantically searching for my car keys, turning the entire apartment upside down. After giving up and calling a locksmith, I found the keys… in the fridge. Because apparently I put my leftover pizza on top of them. FML
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Top comments
ManInTheMachine 20
I'm going to hazard a guess and say "run to the gas station" is only an expression.
Wizardo 34
Should have checked the obvious places first... but apparently covert is overt for you.
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Comments (37)
catkat1988 17
If you really did run to the gas station, what were you doing with your car keys?
JocelynKaulitz 28
Apparently his keys were just chillin' on the seat…
ManInTheMachine 20
I'm going to hazard a guess and say "run to the gas station" is only an expression.
CountEjacula 8
I'm guessing this was a joke, and unfortunately not very many people found it funny.
threer 30
Hilarious to me..
Wizardo 34
Should have checked the obvious places first... but apparently covert is overt for you.
Zimmington 21
You know what they say "It's always the last place you look."
TheDrifter 24
Wouldn't make much sense to keep looking after you found them would it? So, of course it's the last place you look.
Zimmington 21
Why not keep looking? Never know what you might find. Change, Candy, a long lost sibling.
bellidona 15
Why wouldn't u look in ur car or pockets before digging thru some nasty trash ?
thumbsdwn2mylife 9
Next time if there is a next time please check normal places and leave the trash as the last resort
Blink_me26 21
Next time? There will be no next time. I apologise even though I know it's lies.
packrat 26
Must say, I wish the trash was the first place I checked to find the double-sided tape meant to keep my wedding dress from falling off my shoulders. There would have been much, much, much less yelling at assorted people, including maid of honour, best friend and photographers (the culprits, btw).
Axipiter 24
FML hijack! Squawk 7500!
Cocainee 6
Ahh OP, nothing worse than the extreme measures we take when we're in a rush! Rational thinking goes out the door!
hbake 13
Retracing your steps is generally the effective method, but not when it involves digging in trash, save that for last lol
chuka81 27
It's not always bad to go through the trash. I found money once. Maybe you'd be lucky, next time you might find something interesting.
MidnaLink 35
I really hope you were looking for something in particular.
DrownedMyFish 18
I don't think there will be a next time.
jaydotch 5
Agreed, hobos find the best stuff
MidnaLink 35
Well, at least you're a garbage picker for a good reason...
UFIUETSimpdesign 5
Hahahahaha cool xD u went thro other ppls shit
AGB10 19
So you'd rather turn up dirty and full of trash but a bit later and cleaner?