Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked up to a store’s automatic doors. They didn’t open. I waved my arms, stepped back and forward again, nothing. A staff member came over, tapped a button, and said, “It’s manual.” FML
Today, when I went to the shopping centre, the automatic door wouldn't open for me. I had to stand there and wait until someone else walked by to open it for me. I have dwarfism and this is a daily occurrence. FML
Today, at the store, I didn't hear the cashier when she asked if I had a loyalty card. She took one look at my naturally bitchy-looking face and muttered "It's my JOB to ask, jeez." FML
Today, I was using the restroom at a gas station when someone hurriedly knocked on the door. Thinking that it was my sister, I playfully said, "Hold up, hoe!" I opened the door to see a goth woman with an edgy haircut giving me a death stare. FML
Today, a woman came into the gas station where I work, yelling because her credit card wouldn't read at the pump. I politely told her that I could set the pump up for a set amount, and she could swipe the card at the register. Her response? "You need Jesus." FML
Today, I was at a store when I saw a cute girl from my school. Trying to act cool, I went to hold the door for her. Too bad it was an automatic door. FML
Today, I stopped by the gas station. As I was filling up I noticed a cute guy at the pump next to me. When I was done, I gave him a wink before opening my car door. It was locked. I had to call my Dad to bring my spare keys. The guy was laughing the whole time as I waited for my Dad to show up. FML
Today, at a local mini mart, I tried several times to open a door that clearly said "PUSH" by pulling it, much to the amusement to the customers and staff inside. FML
Today, I was late to work and couldn't get my gas tank open. Panicking, I asked the only person around to help me who happened to be a very large man. He was able to open it for me and seemed really nice. That is until he pulled out a knife and robbed me. FML
Today, I was leaving the grocery store when an old woman started yelling at me for not holding the door open for her. She accused me of being "everything wrong with the younger generation". It was an automatic door. FML
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Top comments
iMarriedadouche 3
How did you "prove" the existence of your soul?!!
kendybendy 6
Was she blonde?
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Comments (148)
alan831 9
It's pretty awesome that you even made that joke.
oj101 33
Good on you for being able to laugh at yourself :) The cashier is either extremely stupid and shouldn't even be able to operate the cashier, or is a damn fine troll. This is slightly off topic, but why don't ginger people dye their hair? If they hate it so much, and claim it hinders their lives, then why not dye and get chemical peels if they are not happy with themselves.
Sputnikspak 13
I think red hair is lovely on most people, in it's natural state. The OP never said he was unhappy with his red hair. He was just joking about a stereotype that many people believe is true. Most redheads I know are more self-conscious about their freckles than they are about their hair.
oj101 33
I think red hair can look good, and that the OP is certainly comfortable within how he looks - even going as far to laughing about himself. Note- I asked why don't gingers who hate their hair/freckles get dyed/chemical peel or laser surgery to get rid of it. Seems simple.
RedPillSucks 33
@Sputnikspak, Seeking enlightenment (from FML, God help me). Do many people actually believe that (redheads don't have a soul)? I thought that was just some cruel joke, like blonds being stupid.
doodlecloud 27
I think redheads that are really that unhappy DO dye their hair...I think a chemical peel to get rid of freckles is a bit extreme though..
Girreth 7
65, It's a joke. Rarely do people actually believe things like that.
confusdsincbirth 5
@26 Just because one dyes their hair doesn't mean they're automatically granted a soul; you have to earn that. Also, before anyone even mentions it, I can't directly reply to 26 using the button because my very old and disappointing iPod touch won't allow it.
Attica 20
On the upside, you have a sense of humour! Too bad the cashier didn't, but no one can win 'em all.
htownpostman 16
What a waste of a lead comment..
htownpostman 16
Regardless if who's dumber, the problem I see is this cashier holding the OP hostage and not allowing her to leave... I would have walked away and asked someone else or tried again
htownpostman 16
*of
xKites 4
I'm still trying to find out what encouraged you to ask this.
gracehi 33
No shirt, no shoes, no soul, no service.
KingCeltic77 18
I used to be a ginger until I killed someone and absorbed his soul.
suri23 11
Gingers don't haves souls?