Today, I had a meeting with a place that does Terramation (turns you into compost) to plan for my Mom who has stage 4 lung cancer. It feels surreal to have a professional conversation about plans and finances for when my Mom meets her end. I'm glad she knows what she wants, and it isn't a last minute deal, but dang… FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad told me, in the form of a soliloquy, to have a better attitude about death and dying. I have terminal cancer. FML
Today, my mom made the (not) very wise decision to once again inform me that my grandma is in rapidly declining health, and as a result she is not long for this world. My brain took this as an opportunity to push my anxiety into overdrive. I can't stop thinking about what will happen when my grandma dies. FML
Today, I'm diagnosed with a terminal liver cancer. I live abroad, away from my family, so I called them and asked them to come visit me, possibly for the last time. I even offered to pay for the travel both ways. The mother, with a quite indifferent tone, declined my offer and hung up the fuckin' phone on me! FML
Today, I visited my Mum. She has invited me to visit her before, but kept cancelling whenever I tried to arrange an actual visit. I finally went over anyway, only to find her in a soiled nappy, room in ruins, with kidney failure-induced dementia. Sometimes they hide it well over the phone. FML
Today, after three weeks of calling the office and telling them how much she needed it, my mom's doctor finally agreed to give her an oxygen tank. She died last night. FML
Today, I called my mother to tell her about my terminal cancer diagnosis. She responded with, "What makes you think I care at all?" before hanging up. FML
Today, I found out that the giant tumour on my leg isn’t cancerous or dangerous. My mom cried, and I was super relieved. Later on, I heard her on the phone in tears because now she won’t be able to get a free vacation or home renovations from the Make A Wish foundation. FML
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
Today, my mother called me and told me that she went to the hospital. This wasn't a surprise 'cos she normally goes to the hospital for the smallest things. I was a smartass and asked, "What now? You finally have lung cancer from all those cigarettes?" Apparently, she does. FML
Today, I was at my mom's funeral. My sisters and I were sitting in the front row. The funeral director, whom we had met with twice before, was going around greeting everyone. When she got to us, she asked where our mom was. Seriously? FML
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Top comments
juggalo2 22
I'm sorry for your loss. Having honest conversations about the death of a loved one will bring a lot of emotions to the fore, but is it really different from planning a traditional cremation and / or burial, or just discussing a will?
tiptoppc 21
I think it’s still a stage of grief he is going through. Maybe denial? Either way, no one wants to acknowledge the death of a loved one before they die, as most don’t want to believe it’s real. Just remember, funerals aren’t done for those who died. They are there for those who remain, to have a definitive closure point in which their loved one has departed forever. And if you ignore things before death does happen, you really will hate the avalanche of emotions you get hit with all of a sudden when you are forced to face the facts. It happened with me and a good friend of mine. I tried to not acknowledge what was coming even though I saw it, but damn was it crippling when it came out. And now I have many regrets I didn’t acknowledge it sooner. I could’ve said more. But when covid broke any in person contact for most, I didn’t get to say my goodbyes. Sorry OP. This truly sucks. I feel for you.
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juggalo2 22
I'm sorry for your loss. Having honest conversations about the death of a loved one will bring a lot of emotions to the fore, but is it really different from planning a traditional cremation and / or burial, or just discussing a will?
tiptoppc 21
I think it’s still a stage of grief he is going through. Maybe denial? Either way, no one wants to acknowledge the death of a loved one before they die, as most don’t want to believe it’s real. Just remember, funerals aren’t done for those who died. They are there for those who remain, to have a definitive closure point in which their loved one has departed forever. And if you ignore things before death does happen, you really will hate the avalanche of emotions you get hit with all of a sudden when you are forced to face the facts. It happened with me and a good friend of mine. I tried to not acknowledge what was coming even though I saw it, but damn was it crippling when it came out. And now I have many regrets I didn’t acknowledge it sooner. I could’ve said more. But when covid broke any in person contact for most, I didn’t get to say my goodbyes. Sorry OP. This truly sucks. I feel for you.