Today, my recently-neutered dog has to wear the cone of shame for several weeks. The sounds he makes when he's being rambunctious are now augmented even further by the sound of the cone scraping and bashing against everything. I tell you, it's so much more annoying than it sounds. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dog was trying to chew on his bone, but he kept losing it because he still has to wear the cone of shame. He eventually lost it completely. When I tried to help him by picking it up, he bit my arm. FML
Today, my male cat's cone is slightly bigger than his sister's. That means when he eats, the food keeps falling off his raised plate, he can barely reach it when it's on the floor, it passes his mouth to go under his chin, etc. He has to wear the damn thing for two weeks. On his behalf, FML
Today, I finally got the hearing aids that I've needed for years. My dog quickly learned that if he quietly sneaks up behind me and barks, it'll scare the hell out of me. It's now his favorite game. FML
Today, I've just moved into a new apartment. It's also the day my big baby of a dog stepped on a rock and began yelping when I tried to touch his paw. He "suddenly" felt better after I carried him inside. Now everyone thinks I'm beating my dog. FML
Today, my dog somehow managed to swallow a ring that my mother had bought me. Now I must carefully poke and search through each pile of dog crap I find in my yard for the next week. FML
Today, my roommate and I were talking about how much better my dog has gotten at not peeing in the house, and how I was doing better at not losing my temper when he did. A few hours after this conversation, the dog pissed all over the floor and I screamed so loudly that now my throat hurts. FML
Today, I was discharged from the hospital after having scrotal surgery. When I got home, the anesthetic had worn off, but I felt okay. Then my dog jumped up at me, paws slamming straight into my nuts. FML
Today, I took my dog to the vet. Wanting to seem like a responsible owner, I lifted him onto the exam table. My back then cracked loudly, I dropped him, and he ran straight into a trash can. The vet sighed and asked, “Rough day for both of you?” FML
Today, my fiancé and I moved into a new home a few houses away from our previous one. We were excited about not hearing our roommate's dog howling non-stop anymore. We can hear him from the new house. Very clearly. FML
Today, my cat has always been rather antisocial, but after his first trip to the vet since getting fixed, he's become talkative, clingy, and goofy. I'd enjoy it, if not for the fact that he's nearly hurt himself several times because he keeps doing stupid shit. He might need to go back to the vet at this rate. FML
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Top comments
wtafisgoah54 4
Buy the inflatable neck ring. Does the same thing as the cone, but a lot quieter.
TwoBytesCarley 27
It’s also a whole lot more comfortable for the dog to sleep and move in. The inflatable cone was the only way I could get my dog to sleep after her ACL surgery (she would not lay down with the regular cone around her neck).
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Comments (5)
wtafisgoah54 4
Buy the inflatable neck ring. Does the same thing as the cone, but a lot quieter.
TwoBytesCarley 27
It’s also a whole lot more comfortable for the dog to sleep and move in. The inflatable cone was the only way I could get my dog to sleep after her ACL surgery (she would not lay down with the regular cone around her neck).
RichardPencil 32
I doubt it. It sounds very annoying and somehow, I can imagine high levels of annoyingness. Why isn't annoyingness a word? It's not the same as annoyance. It's the noun form of annoying. I had to override my spell-checker to get it through. Are you annoyed yet?
Anderling 33
I’m sorry OP, I’m sure it’s not as funny living through it, but I’m just picturing the WOBBLE WOBBLE WOBBLE sound that laminated paper makes as your dog goes about its day and I’m laughing.
Hangryko 32
Would you rather wear the cone of irresponsible dog owner? At least your dog's cone is helping him recover faster, focus on that instead.
emmalou 19
I saw something on Pinterest or maybe tiktok about using a pool noodle as a neck ring