Today, we had our divorce hearing and now it is final. As we were leaving the courthouse, I told my ex-wife how happy I was that we were finally free from each other. Then my junky old van wouldn't start and I had to beg her for a ride home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on my way to work when my ex-wife drove past me in the car she got from me. She fucked me over so hard in the divorce that I have to ride my bike to work while wearing a full suit. FML
Today, I won my custody battle. I wish I could be happy about it, but it strained my current marriage so badly that now I'm going through my second divorce. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. Driving her home, we got stuck in a construction zone. I waited half an hour with with my ex-girlfriend bawling her eyes out in the passenger seat as I watched the traffic lady eat her lunch. FML
Today, I walked from my friend's wedding to my divorce. FML
Today, my my soon to be ex-wife found out I was telling the truth and never cheated. She wanted to get back together but I told her that we're too far into the divorce proceedings to turn back, and there's just no fixing our marriage. She then told me she's filing for full custody with no visitation rights. FML
Today, my current wife left me for my ex-wife. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house so that he could break up with me. I went out to my car to leave only to discover that all of the wheels had been stolen. Even the spare. I had to spend the rest of the day with my ex-boyfriend finding a way to get my car home. FML
Today, my wife said she wants a divorce. Three days ago, I added her onto the title to my house, my bank accounts, and my business. FML
Today, my parents told me they were getting divorced, at the beginning of a family road trip, adding that this'll be the last thing we ever do as a family. FML
Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML
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Top comments
Sawadee 0
I remember moderating it and I almost clicked NO because I think YDI
Avenging_Angel 0
...or you couldve called a friend to pick you up, thus avoiding the humiliation of having to beg your ex wife for a ride home. YDI!
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Comments (95)
legalizexweed 0
you definitaly should have taken a cab you obviously have no dignity
hellosailorr 0
i agree with #64. it also seems to me like you're not the brightest tool in the shed either, for not thinking of any of the other alternatives people have posted on here.
mezentius 0
Maybe she was also happy about being separated, certain marriages can be unpleasant for both parties.
airplanefood 0
Hahaha I find it funny how he posts this on FML after his divorce and gets a hundred hate filled flames. Well, at least OP doesn't have any pride to lose. Hope you get your car fixed soon.
kaylaella 0
KARMAS A B I T C H
jem1991 0
i would've walked or taken a taxi or called AAA. i'm proud like that.
at0micmin3r 23
Maybe the bitch WAS a bitch to him, how do we know? I call FYL
deathproof_fml 0
YDI. Karma is funny.
lady_gogo 0
what can I say.. life sucks and so are you... kidding!
kellster 2
Possibly you could have chosen not to be an asshole about the whole thing. YDI.