Today, it's my wedding day. I have a cold sore that makes me look like The Joker. Make-up won't cover it and the emergency medicine my doctor gave me only irritates it more. My future husband asks, "Why so serious?" and laughs whenever he sees me. Fantastic. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I have what is probably a cold sore on my upper lip. I also have a mustache, which keeps rubbing against it. Because of this, no matter what I do, it stings. The next few days are fixing to be very, very long and miserable. FML
Today, my brother and his girlfriend got married. I got a pretty bad pimple on my nose not long before, and I'd tried to pop it. It turned into a really bad scab instead, so I put makeup on it. I didn't notice until after the wedding that the makeup made the scab look badly infected. FML
Today, was my wedding day. Right before I walked down the aisle in my gorgeous white dress, the woman who did my makeup saw a blemish. She went to squirt concealer on her finger, but squirted the orange concealer all over my dress. FML
Today, it's my wedding day. It was meant to be perfect. The bouquet, along with a high pollen count, set my hay fever off. I walked down the aisle in front of 200 people with streaming eyes and a runny nose; I then had a sneezing fit during my vows and blew a large snot bubble. Real attractive. FML
Today, as always, I have a type of eczema that flares up when I'm stressed out or anxious. And today, the girl I've been in love with for 4 years asked me out on a date. We meet up in a few hours, and right now I look like I have smallpox. FML
Today, I woke up with bronchitis and hemorrhoids. I'm getting married in 3 days. FML
Today, I went on a first date with my crush. Right before the date, I noticed a monstrous pimple in the middle of my forehead. I covered it with make-up, but it was still visible. The guy spent the whole evening laughing at me and telling me that I look like an unicorn. FML
Today, I reassured everyone at work that the mark on my lip was just a pimple, not a cold sore. It's actually neither. I, a 21-year-old young woman, slipped while shaving my moustache and sliced off part of my lip. FML
Today, poorly applied makeup made it look like I have a black eye in most of my wedding photos. I would have laughed it off, but I was showing them to my brother who was deployed during the actual wedding. He saw the black eye, assumed it was domestic abuse, and attacked my husband. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me an early wedding present. I opened the box and inside was the most adorable cat I've ever seen! It got scared, jumped out, clawed my face and pissed everywhere. My wedding is tomorrow and I look like Frankenstein's bride. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Magic_Mushroom 7
Ask him if he wants to see a magic trick.
NickaPLZ 26
Congrats on your wedding.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (51)
kieralumina 30
im trying to resist the kpop referenceability...but, other than a cold sore and husband who wants you to get your crayon, congratulations op ^^
simsgirlgem 25
Hey at least he's not being an ass and saying he can't be seen with someone so ugly
tararochelle 18
At least he has a sense of humor about it! I know right now all you want to do is look perfect, I'm sure you still look beautiful. Lots of people have stuff like that happen under stress. And you can have your pictures airbrushed!
perdix 31
At the reception, instead of doing the Hokey-Pokey, you can do the Herp-a-Derp.
knightof2010 1
did you try windex??
M3DIC4T3 29
What could windex possibly do for the bride's situation?!
balletteacher 11
It's a reference to My Big Fat Greek Wedding.
sithlordnergal 5
Didn't you know that any ailment, from psoriasis to poison ivy, could be cured with Windex.
chanellgymnast 17
Aww. At least your hubby has a sense of humor! Congrats on your wedding!
f_ourlives2013 7
At least he's being a good sport..? That sucks though :(
jem88 4
I'd be more concerned that you couldn't kiss him, or shouldn't when you have an outbreak/cold sore since you could spread herpes to him that way.
nanner42 13
Ha! That's funny
Al3xv3l92 24
Ask him do you wanna know how I got these scars.