Today, I told my husband we should try go vegan for a while to see if there were any health benefits. He threw me over his shoulder and put me outside, because, “crazy plant ladies live outside with the other vegetables.” FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, as we were discussing our plans for 2026, I suggested we go vegan as it's healthier and better for the planet. My husband said, "Ask me to go vegan again and I'll have divorce papers for you the next day." Why? Why are men so adamantly opposed to veganism? FML
Today, I fed my husband a vegan beef burger so I could show him that it tastes exactly the same when he didn’t notice. He noticed on the first bite and spat it across the kitchen because he thought the meat had expired before I cooked it, and tasted disgusting. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me the sauce he made for our dinner that was meat-based, trying to show me how nice meat is and stop me being a weirdo vegan. The reason I’m vegan is because my digestive system can’t handle animal protein. I’m writing this from the bathroom, vomiting myself to death. FML
Today, after weeks of me "forgetting" to buy meat and animal products, my husband asked to talk. I was hoping he was getting the hints that I wanted us to go vegan. He wanted me to get checked for early-onset dementia. FML
Today, I had to tell my wife that the new "vegan" diet she has put us on is not working with my body. It's not the horrible gas, hot shits, or constant hunger that made me realize this. It was the dream I had about fried chicken that did. FML
Today, my boyfriend spent half his paycheck on gourmet steaks, bacon, and all sorts of other meat. When I reminded him we were trying to go meatless to help the planet, he said, "Yeah, I'm done with that. The planet can burn." We'd only been vegan three days. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by saying, "Good morning! We're going to be vegans from now on." FML
Today, I talked with my fiance about our wedding. He drew up a prenuptial agreement. One of the provisions said that if I ever go vegetarian or vegan, we immediately divorce and I get nothing. I thought it was a joke and laughed. He was deadly serious. FML
Today, I went on a date with a great vegan guy in my class. We went to a vegi-restaurant, I dutifully ate all the meatless dishes, but he seemed pissed about something, and other diners kept giving me angry looks. After we left, I realised I'd worn my leather jacket to the date. FML
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Top comments
Hangryko 32
Instead of suggesting going completely vegan, he may have been more receptive to having plant based meals occasionally. Either way, that was a huge overreaction on his part; carrying you out was over the top.
SylvarLorali 4
you don't make friends with salad.
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Comments (6)
SylvarLorali 4
you don't make friends with salad.
Hangryko 32
Instead of suggesting going completely vegan, he may have been more receptive to having plant based meals occasionally. Either way, that was a huge overreaction on his part; carrying you out was over the top.
FluffythePink 24
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 That man's a keeper.
OptimalPath 13
I start to see a pattern, when you impose your ways of life onto people unwilling to accept them... you become a subject on FML.
Evolving_Squid 15
That's because veganism isn't just food, it's a political position and a lifestyle choice. It'd be on par with "I think I am going to become a Pentecostal fundamentalist". If you meant vegetarian, maybe approach it from that angle, and recognize, that "vegan" is a loaded term that carries a freight train of bollocks behind it.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
OMG that's hilarious! I'm assuming he didn't lock you out lol, so just go back in and don't bring up that subject again. :D