Today, my son is failing his college classes because he thinks he’s going to inherit the family business. It's a garden centre owned by my older sister; I'm just an employee, it will be inherited by my niece. My son actually thought only eldest sons inherited family property. God I raised an idiot. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my eldest son keeps threatening to run away, and I found out that his sister is encouraging him, because she recently found out what ”inheritance” means, and thinks she’ll get more if he’s gone, or at the very least she can have his bigger bedroom and all his cool stuff. FML
Today, after years busting my hump for my father's business with the understanding of one day taking it over, he informed me that my nephew, who has never shown any interest in the company, is being brought in to take it over. FML
Today, in a misguided attempt to earn my asshole dad's approval I went to university to get my business degree and took over the family restaurant. Now I have all the stress of managing the restaurant, he has retired and is moving abroad. Oh, and he still isn’t proud of me. FML
Today, my son is an idiot, but I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt by giving him a job as a cashier in one of my stores. Within half an hour, I was sent security footage from that store's manager showing my son on his phone, ignoring customers, picking his nose, and stealing money from the till. FML
Today, I was forced to hire my boss’s niece. The kid failed out of college twice, but I could have forgiven her if she worked hard to learn, but she's so lazy and dumb, so dumb that if she shook her head I think I’d actually hear her single brain cell rattle like a rock in a box. FML
Today, I gave my son a job as a shelf stacker in one of my stores. He is in his thirties and is so dumb that he has been fired from every other job for incompetence. I don’t want him to starve or lose his flat, but I also couldn’t give him an important job in case he screwed it up. FML
Today, not only is my son stupid enough to spend £50 on a bag of garden weeds because the dealer told him it was marijuana, he's also stupid enough to refuse to believe he was conned, and try to smoke it anyway. FML
Today, my boss brought his son in as our new manager. This kid has zero experience in our industry and yet waltzed into a £75,000 job where his sole responsibility is telling me how to do a skilled job I started before he was born. Plus half the stuff he tries to tell me is incorrect. Cretin. FML
Today, I found out that 15 years ago my father threw out my college acceptance letters so that I could stay home and take over the family's funeral home business. FML
Today, my dad refuses to let me inherit all of his money, which might just put a roof over my head when I’m older. *His* money? Well, actually, he inherited it. FML
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Top comments
Plop 17
Wait.... How???!? Did you raise that clusterfuck of a human being in the middle ages? Are you some sort of time-traveler? And how did he make into college in the first place with what's obviously room-temperature IQ?
RichardPencil 32
Wait, the right of primogeniture is gone? ****!!! Don't tell my little brother and sister! They've been so nice to me in hopes of getting crumbs from my inevitable inheritance. The less they know, the better!
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Comments (8)
Plop 17
Wait.... How???!? Did you raise that clusterfuck of a human being in the middle ages? Are you some sort of time-traveler? And how did he make into college in the first place with what's obviously room-temperature IQ?
Hangryko 32
Time to give him a wake up call.
Charlie Given 28
Sounds like your son may have some misogyny issues.
RichardPencil 32
Wait, the right of primogeniture is gone? ****!!! Don't tell my little brother and sister! They've been so nice to me in hopes of getting crumbs from my inevitable inheritance. The less they know, the better!
Jon Tessler 14
well at least your last sentence is truthful. YDI
JackWood 21
We can't put this into perspective without knowing your level of education? Did you finish HS?
JasonThorn 23
Another "blood is thicker than water" idiot who doesn't realize the FULL saying is, "The blood of the covenant is thick than the water of the womb," meaning agreements made carry more weight than bloodlines.
JasonThorn 23
thicker*. Sorry.