Today, my fiancé said we should get married in a Satanic temple. He's already found one he likes, and says we should get matching tattoos instead of rings. Never date a man who didn't have a rebellious period as a teenager, or it'll come out in his 30s. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized that my fiancé is more invested in getting his lingerie and tattoo-clad friend on the cover of Inked Magazine than help plan our wedding. FML
Today, my fiancé freaked when he noticed the tattoo on my wrist, and demanded to know when I got it. It was two years before we even started dating. FML
Today, it was supposed to be my wedding but my fiancé insisted we be married by his childhood priest, a real bible thumper. This arsehole tried to change our vows at the altar and told me wives should know their place, so I slapped him and the wedding is delayed until we get a new priest. FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad refused to give me permission to marry his daughter because I'm "covered in gang tattoos" and he doesn't want his daughter marrying a criminal. The only tattoos I have are the Game of Thrones direwolf and a quote from the Lord of the Rings movies. FML
Today, my fiancée suggested a 'Back To The Future' - themed wedding. FML
Today, my son wears all dark clothes, has gotten evil looking tattoos, and worships the devil. It was kinda cute when he was 13, slightly concerning when he turned 18, but now he’s 30 and I’m unsure if I should be more accepting of his lifestyle or just plain old shit scared. FML
Today, I told my fiancé that I don’t believe in God, so I won’t be going to church anymore because I’ll be picking up the Sunday shift at work. I don’t have a fiancé anymore because I’m, “a godless heathen who will burn for eternity.” FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to get married and have kids soon. She had a fit. Apparently it's creepy and freakish for a man to want a family, and it means I'm secretly a crazy religious fundamentalist. Huh? FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't follow her latest fad of becoming a goth, which involves dressing like an undertaker's haunted hearse and putting on eyeliner. Last week she was into Reggae and beanie hats. FML
Today, I went on my third date with a great guy. We finally got round to talking about his tattoos. All 57 are related to his best friend. All of them. The best friend he never stops talking about. Somehow I don't think this will work out. FML
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Top comments
LJB93 2
just run with it.. turning 30 is actually kinda freeing like you dont care about others opinions.. so he’s probs just having that stage, just run with it, when it comes to his crazy antics he’ll likely change his mind. or.. you can make even crazier suggestions and he’ll end up wanting a normal wedding.. either way good luck OP
BurnInDemonFire 39
Just to stress... I'm not the fiancé from this story. My user name only appears to be related to Satan, but it's actually an incredibly obscure reference to a TV show I watched as a kid.
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Comments (4)
tiptoppc 21
Sounds cool Tbh, i’m 40 and either atheistic or satanic(depending on how i want to make someone clutch their pearls). But whatever. It’s all a scam
Yudith 28
Satanic weddings are better than atheist ones, though. Atheist marriages are short affairs made in a court of justice by a bored official, while with Satanic weddings, you get a cool basement flooded with show lights, music, a priest dressed like Beelzebub's cousin, and over-the-top wedding dresses and/or vampire attire.
DLBL 23
I'm sorry you did not see this coming. Please listen to your heart on this matter. (smile)
LJB93 2
just run with it.. turning 30 is actually kinda freeing like you dont care about others opinions.. so he’s probs just having that stage, just run with it, when it comes to his crazy antics he’ll likely change his mind. or.. you can make even crazier suggestions and he’ll end up wanting a normal wedding.. either way good luck OP
BurnInDemonFire 39
Just to stress... I'm not the fiancé from this story. My user name only appears to be related to Satan, but it's actually an incredibly obscure reference to a TV show I watched as a kid.