Today, while at a family reunion, I jokingly asked my 18-year-old son, "When are you and your girlfriend going to give me a grandson?" He then retorted, "When are you going to die?" I was unable to answer at all. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my four-year-old asked me when I was going to die. I replied "Not for a long time, why?" He looked at me and stated "Because I only want to live with Daddy." FML
Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML
Today, I was talking to my only grandson about how I was going to the dentist to get my teeth fixed and how it was going to cost a lot of money, he replied saying "Who cares, you're going to die soon anyways". FML
Today, I went to the graveyard with my little brother to visit my grandfather's grave. While we were there, my brother suddenly asked me, "Can you die now? I hate you." He's 7 years-old. FML
Today, my only child introduced his new girlfriend to me. He is 36 and has no children. She is 46 and has a pregnant daughter who she is very close with. I don't know if I'll ever be a grandfather, but in any case, my son is going to be one before me. FML
Today, I'm beginning to regret explaining death to my 3-year-old son. We were at the supermarket when he looked at an elderly woman and loudly told her "You're gonna die soon!" FML
Today, my mum asked when she's getting grandkids. I had to tell her that, at 21 years-old, I hadn't even managed to get a boyfriend yet. FML
Today, I was talking with my Grandma, who lives on the opposite side of the state, and congratulated her on reaching 87. She said she was hoping to reach 90. My brain went in a very morbid direction as I quietly wondered if she'd live to 90. She didn't hear it but my dad, her son, did. Apologizing didn't help. FML
Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML
Today, my mom asked me out of the blue if I was ever going to consider getting married. It wasn't until after the conversation ended that I remembered my siblings are all either single like I am, or incapable of having children. I am my mother's last hope of becoming a grandma, and she reminds me all the time. FML
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Top comments
randybryant799 21
Why would you joke about teenagers giving you a grandchild?
Sdog 6
You sound like an irritating person.
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Comments (10)
Plop 17
When are you going to learn to shut your mouth and mind your f*cking business?
randybryant799 21
Why would you joke about teenagers giving you a grandchild?
Sdog 6
You sound like an irritating person.
Grizz8831 14
but... they are so crazy! isn't that joke just crazy!? all their friends are always talking about how funny and crazy they are!!! I agree, these type of people annoy me. jokes to make other feel awkward in a social setting, that makes them hate people.
RichardPencil 32
That's a pretty crappy joke. Maybe you can continue your bit by suggesting he hit on some teenage cousins and make your wishes come true. This routine would be hilarious in Mississippi or Texas. Maybe you ought to see if Jeff Foxworthy wants to use it in his act.
cuz803 46
Having kids is growing less common. People value their money, passions, and and mental stamina. The world is also overpopulated so your son would do himself and the world a favor by not having any.
1known 34
The world is not overpopulated, we can easily feed billions of people.
Charlie Given 28
Are you really that delusional or incredibly misinformed, over 40% of the world can't feed itself properly and you're saying easily done!!! 🤦♂️
alex_jaguara 33
No, we can't.
debbyman13 21
Define “easily”
1known 34
That question is one of the worst you can ask. And it gets even worst when you ask someone so young. Seriously you want your son to be a father at 18???
Hangryko 32
Right, it was a "joke." It was stupid enough to request a gender of your grandchild, let alone asking for one. Your son does not owe you grandchildren.
sixxis 7
You have a disrespectful bastard on your hands. Let him fend for himself and he’ll need you alive for sure
Hangryko 32
Nope, OP was definitely more disrespectful for even asking him that question.
mccuish 25
That kind of response makes me never want to have kids
Grizz8831 14
that kind of response is perfect for making sure that question doesn't come up again for a long while.