Today, my boyfriend's little sister told me she hates me. I thought she was just a jealous, whiny nitwit like most kids are, until she calmly walked over to the wall and headbutted it hard. She burst into tears, ran out of the room, and told my boyfriend I hit her. He believed her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met a guy who said he thinks he's in love with my sister. As a joke, I told him that my sister cheats on everyone. I get home to find my sister crying, because some 'person' told her boyfriend that she's cheating on him. FML
Today, I realized I hate my boyfriend's little sister enough to break up with him. FML
Today, my younger sister stopped talking to me. I got engaged to my boyfriend of 4 years and apparently, she's been in love with him since she met him. Through me. She's 12. FML
Today, I heard my sister screaming from the basement, "Don't you hit me, you asshole!" Knowing her boyfriend was over, I ran downstairs with my baseball bat, ready to smash the fucker hitting my sister. Turns out they were just playing Mario Kart and he rammed her off the edge of a bridge. FML
Today, I was meeting my boyfriend's family for the first time. The minute I stepped in the door his mother hit me in the face and kicked me out because I was "the slut her husband cheated on her with." My older sister and I look much alike. Too much alike. FML
Today, my girlfriend's friend told her she had seen me shopping with a cute girl. When I came back home, my girlfriend punched me in the face and asked who the girl was. Apparently her friend didn't tell her the "cute girl" was my three year-old niece. I lost a tooth from the punch. FML
Today, my sister told me her ex-boyfriend abused her and I went to go confront him. Turns out, she lied because he dumped her after she cheated on him. I got my ass kicked. FML
Today, my sister punched me in the face. My dad was actually annoyed with me when I told him. He said I'll never be a "real man" if I can't take a hit from a girl. FML
Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML
Today, I found out my that my girlfriend's parents hate me, all because they saw me laughing and hanging out with another girl. That other girl was my sister. FML
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Top comments
theperfectchild 13
Demon child?
glabberfasted 16
This is a tough one, because, while his sister is actually kind of crazy, I feel like a brother SHOULD believe his sister over his girlfriend. That is, of course, if his sister isn't a whack job.
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Comments (151)
Szaszaspasz 26
I agree! You never know what other shit she can make up. Stuff that can have ramifications on your reputation for the rest of your life!
unicornslayer69 8
Reminds me of phineas and ferb
itsCoCobish 7
Oh hell nah, you need to get out of that relationship now!
Chazzzor 10
Google brother sister incest....
Bellock86 2
OMG. That's right out of a tv show called phineas and ferb that my kids watch. this dude little sister is an evil satanic little bitch. you have my sympathies OP
WittyMoron 22
Every time she engages in conversation with you, bring out your phone and film her all sneaky-beaky like. Then show him next time she engages in "Concussion Time"
asira 2
Kids are so evil nowadays