Today, I had to have the awkward conversation with my adult daughter that the reason I’m divorcing her mom is because she’s not my daughter, she’s actually the daughter of her mom's secret boyfriend, who she’s been screwing behind my back for almost 30 years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my eldest daughter announced she was getting divorced. She never even told me she was married. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my daughter flew completely off the handle when she found out I have a girlfriend, and called me an unfaithful sinning bastard, who’s going to hell for cheating on her mother. Her mother's been dead for 20 years and this is the first time I’ve met a woman since then. FML
Today, I thought my parents were divorcing over money, but it turns out the real reason is that my dad has been cheating for two years with a 20 year-old girl from his work. He only told my mom two months ago, after he got the girl pregnant. FML
Today, I convinced my daughter to tell my wife that the coworker she’s been getting a bit too close to lately touched her inappropriately so she’d stop interacting with him. After arguing and confrontation between the four of us, my daughter threw me under the bus and told them the truth. Now they’re all mad at me. FML
Today, my daughter's 14-year-old boyfriend confessed, in front of her, that he only went out with her so he might have a chance to date me. My daughter isn't speaking to me. FML
Today, I found out that my estranged daughter has been married for five years. I wasn't told of or invited to their wedding, and the only reason I know now is because she needs money for a divorce lawyer. FML
Today, I had to have a very unfortunate conversation with my young daughter about homophobia and bigotry, after the neighbor said she can’t play with her kids anymore. My daughter mentioned she had two mommies, me and my platonic best fiend who’s her godmother. My poor baby is still inconsolable. FML
Today, I admitted to my best friend that I was having second thoughts about getting married and was probably going to break up with him. Unfortunately, my fiance's daughter, who I absolutely adore, overheard the conversation and threw a huge screaming tantrum asking why I didn't want to be her mommy anymore. FML
Today, I found out my mom was serious when she said she’d never get over me dumping my ex. While babysitting my 6 month-old daughter, she took her to meet said ex for lunch while I was at work. Problem? He’s not my daughter’s father and I broke up with him when I was 16. My husband is pissed as well. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
bidet 10
You could've just said the part about the wife cheating for 30 years and NOT told the daughter that she was the result of that cheating.
core01 30
WHY WOULD YOU TELL HER SHE'S NOT YOUR DAUGHTER?!?!? You will crush her.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (2)
bidet 10
You could've just said the part about the wife cheating for 30 years and NOT told the daughter that she was the result of that cheating.
core01 30
WHY WOULD YOU TELL HER SHE'S NOT YOUR DAUGHTER?!?!? You will crush her.