Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me a magic trick. He filled a bowl with wine, pushed it on top of the ceiling using a broom stick, and held it up there. He told me to hold it and left. Taking my hands off the broomstick would cause the bowl to fall on my expensive new suit. Eventually, it did. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after many hours of practice, I tried to demonstrate my magic tricks to my friends. What wasn't part of the show was accidentally setting my pants on fire and having to put it out with a glass of red wine. FML
Today, at an annual summer family event, I showed my family a magic trick I'd practiced for weeks. The grand finale involved making a coin disappear. Instead, I launched it into my uncle's soup. He digged it out with his spoon, then looked at me and asked if it was for keeps. FML
Today, my boyfriend's obsession with card tricks reached a new low. He barged into the bathroom while I was taking a crap and asked me to pick a card. FML
Today, I tried to impress a girl in a bar with a magic trick. Instead of pulling a coin from behind her ear, I accidentally flicked her glasses straight into her pint of lager. She was far from impressed. FML
Today, my nephew asked if I wanted to see a magic trick. I humored him and let him give it a go. He covered my phone with a blanket, counted to three, and revealed that it had "disappeared." The little genius had dropped it into a fish tank while I wasn't looking. FML
Today, we had a family gathering at my mom's house. I offered to bring dessert, and I was very proud of my homemade cheesecake. As I set it on the table, my uncle decided to do a magic trick with it and make it disappear onto the floor. FML
Today, I attempted to show off my juggling skills at a family gathering using oranges. One slipped out of my hand, hit a shelf, and knocked over a picture of my parents. The glass frame shattered, and now my family thinks I have a vendetta against their marriage. FML
Today, I was on a date with my boyfriend when he suddenly got down on one knee and proposed. A waiter tripped over him and spilled our food all over him. FML
Today, I tried to surprise my boyfriend by jumping on his back for a piggyback ride. He wasn’t expecting it. We both ended up on the floor, and I owe him a new pair of glasses. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. Within seconds of getting my drink, I spilled it all over the table and my scarf. When the waiter was helping clean up the spill, he knocked over my boyfriend's drink. All over my pants. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RedPillSucks 33
How did you not see this coming? Tell your boyfriend about this new trick. Have him bend over, then shove the same wine dripped broomstick up his ass.
untoward 0
YDI for not seeing that "trick" on tv before
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (202)
SadisticStephyy 21
Aw I love that trick :)
ksm80128 0
hahahaha u got owned you shoul have seen it coming. even Ray William Johnson talked about it.
cowsgomooatyou 8
Please, please marry that guy!
W4X 0
This reminds me of a Saw trap, just not as bloody, gorey, and life threataning as one. :P
jasperprinz 0
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHhahHhahahahahah
W4X 0
This reminds me of a Saw trap, just not as bloody, gorey, and life threataning as one. :P
Iknoweverything 29
I vote that FML needs a "WTF?" button along side of the "you deserved it" and "yeah your life sucks" buttons.
nerdwithagun 0
OLD TRICK. Hahaha, I pulled that one on my gf once
hcovballer247 0
Jackirose... That's what I'm trying to figure out too....
MustangGirL 0
Wow. Your own personal Chris Angel!