Jailbird By Anonymous - 06/06/2026 09:00 - United States Today, I asked my foster parents to adopt me. They said no because my dad's getting out of prison soon. FML I agree, your life sucks 474 You deserved it 51 Share Tweet Share
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML I agree, your life sucks 602 You deserved it 128
Today, my boyfriend found out that if guys eat fruit often, their sperm will taste better. He bought a can of fruit for himself to eat, and said that he bought it just for me. This is the most romantic thing he's ever done. FML I agree, your life sucks 42 443 You deserved it 7 905
Today, I woke up on the last day of my vacation at the beach to find that my dog had chewed a hole in the wall of my rented house, 2 hours before the owner arrived to check for any damage. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 607 You deserved it 6 800
Today, I went to a concert with a friend of mine. When his dad came to pick him up, I walked towards the car, expecting a ride. His dad told me he didn't have time to drive me home. I'm his neighbour. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 339 You deserved it 4 391
Today, I kept finding ants crawling all over my face. After a while, I realized that they were all coming from my beard. I have had a population of ants living in my beard. FML I agree, your life sucks 13 765 You deserved it 56 812
Today, my boss wanted to talk to me. Nervous, I went to her office. Turns out that my coworkers talk about me behind my back, and my boss is worried about me. Apparently, I lie about my bad knees, and me wearing black leggings is horrible. Most of them wear sweatpants on a daily basis. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 831 You deserved it 172
Today, a customer got an additional discount, so his total came to $61. He said, "It says they're 3 for $66!” I tried to explain the discount, saying it’s cheaper, but he still insisted on paying $66. I couldn’t modify the price at my end. He left without buying anything. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 817 You deserved it 142